MightyMouse Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 Hi everyone. I stayed calm on the phone but now I can't stop crying... The PET scan was not good--multiple tumors in the liver, sternum and lungs. He sounds so depressed...right now, they want to do another PET scan on Monday, and then decide what to do. I'm having trouble staying positive... Nina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morgan617 Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 I'm sorry the news is not better. I will keep you all in my thoughts. morgan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sally Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 Well wishes sent to your step father, you & family during this hard time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bttrflyamby1981 Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 Hi Nina,It's never easy when loved ones have to go through something like this....since you wanted something positive, try thinking of fun or happy times you have had together. Sometimes putting a smile on your face even if you don't want to can help. Good luck and I'm sending my best for you and your family,Amber Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JanetM Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 HI Nina,I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. I went through it myself about 10 years ago. It was the hardest time of my life. My advice to you would be spend as much time with him as possible (if your life and location allows). I did this with my mother and was so glad I did. Listen to what he has to say. He may have things he needs to say. My mother did. Sadly my mother passed away three days after our wedding. But there are lots of people out there who survive. Please feel free to contact me anytime. My very good wishes, thoughts and prayers and with you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JacobyD Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 Keeping prayer and positive thoughts headed your way. I'm not just saying that. Know that I will be thinking of you and your stepfather today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunfish Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 i didn't have the chance to chime in when you first posted, but your stepfather & all of his family (including you) have been in my thoughts and prayers & will continue to be. i'm so very sorry that the news isn't better. i wish there was something more i could do or say...hang in there the best you can...easier said than done i'm sure. melissa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DancingLight Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 Nina,I cannot imagine what you are feeling--how heavy your heart is. It's okay to not feel positive and let yourself just be sad and cry....even MightyMouses are allowed that! Continued thoughts your way and wishing you and your stepdad peace and comfort...Emily Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MightyMouse Posted May 4, 2006 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 It keeps coming over me in waves. On a good note, I don't have any regrets for things I did or didn't do. Right now, all I want to do is spend more time with him because I know that we've not got too much of it left together.During my childhood, he was my stability; he's always been the one person I knew I cold rely upon, trust implicitly. That, and we had loads of laughs together. Nina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michiganjan Posted May 4, 2006 Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 Nina, I am so sorry that the cancer has spread. I don't know enough about melanoma to know if chemo can work against it, but his doctors will know that. I am praying for you and him.I know all about the can't stop crying. On Tuesday, Jeff left for brunch about 9 a.m. in another city with his group of retirees. As soon as he left I started crying. I was still sitting in the same chair crying when he came home at 2 p.m. He tried to comfort me and that moved the crying up a notch (worse, not better). I stopped long enogh to eat something, then just went back to crying. I cried until about 7 p.m. Then finally stopped, ate something, and watched TV, and then I had yet another bout before I finally went to bed.The next day, we were driving in the car and went past the music store where I take guitar lessons. When I saw the store, I realized that I forgot all about my lesson the previous afternoon. I have to tell you, though, all that crying did help somehow. I have done this before and I will probably do it many more times before Jeff gets through with the cancer.It will be all right, Nina, no matter what the outcome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MightyMouse Posted May 4, 2006 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2006 thank you I've been letting the crying come when it will--the hard part has been finding a private place at work b/c I'm not really up to telling everyone right now. I told my boss and one close friend at work, but other than that, it's all I can handle right now.Melanoma is apparently a different type of beast than other cancers. All that is left if surgery is not an option are experimental treatments and clinical trials--and I don't know if that's what he wants. He got very quiet when we started talking about "what else". I suppose we'll talk about it when we find out more next week.In some ways I have to keep reminding myself that he's been on borrowed time since the first tumor appeared 15 years ago... he was 43 then...crazy...not that far away from my age right now. Like I said, at 58, he's outlived everyone else they have info on for this type of melanoma. Thanks for being here to talk to--it's helped to keep me from completely coming unglued.Nina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taylortotmom Posted May 5, 2006 Report Share Posted May 5, 2006 Nina,I am sending love and good thoughts your way. I am so sorry the news is not better. Take care of yourself.Carmen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophia3 Posted May 5, 2006 Report Share Posted May 5, 2006 Sorry to read all this about your step dad...tough place for you and loved ones to be. Just do what you need to get thru....cry, rant, kvetch, cry...deep breath, then try to distract with silly movies, shows, even old cartoons!!Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.Sophia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wufflebear Posted May 5, 2006 Report Share Posted May 5, 2006 Hi Nina,I am thinking of you and your family. It will be ok. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunsetParadise49 Posted May 5, 2006 Report Share Posted May 5, 2006 Nina, keeping you and the rest of your family in my thoughts and prayers! Take Care Nina! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DSM3KIDZ Posted May 5, 2006 Report Share Posted May 5, 2006 I feel so sad to hear what is happening. Please lean on us whenever. Your family is in my prayersDayna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Julia59 Posted May 6, 2006 Report Share Posted May 6, 2006 Nina,My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. Hang in there the best you can, and don't be afraid to lean on someone when you need it, or lean on us---we'll always be here for you-------- Julie :0) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue Posted May 6, 2006 Report Share Posted May 6, 2006 Nina,As much strength and encouragement you bring to this board, let our prayers and good thoughts fill you with all the peace and comfort you need right now.((Hugs))Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ariella Posted May 7, 2006 Report Share Posted May 7, 2006 Nina,Thinking of you and your family today.Love,ariella Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corina Posted May 7, 2006 Report Share Posted May 7, 2006 nina,sorry to hear about the bad news. i'm thinking about you and sending my best thoughts (as always),corina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poohbear Posted May 8, 2006 Report Share Posted May 8, 2006 Thinking of you and your family. Allow yourself time to feel your feelings and grieve and treasure all the moments you have with him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gena Posted May 8, 2006 Report Share Posted May 8, 2006 Nina - I know this is such a tough time for you and your family. As you know, we're here for you and you can lean on us any time.Sending lots of hugs your way.Gena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest tearose Posted May 9, 2006 Report Share Posted May 9, 2006 oh Nina, I am sorry to hear of this.It is so hard to think of what to say...I can't imagine how you are dealing with your feelings and then trying to be strong when you speak with him...please know my meditations are loving thought are with you.I trust he has the best care and you know you have us too!with you...tearose Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MightyMouse Posted May 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted May 9, 2006 thanks everyone-they are repeating his PET scans today, so I'll know more tomorrow.Nina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoGiuliana Posted May 10, 2006 Report Share Posted May 10, 2006 NinaSo sorry for the bad news and the suffering your stepfather has experienced. That is wonderful that you have so many memories of happy times together. Hope you can be with him through this as much as you need to be. There are so many examples of advanced cancer going back in to remission--there is no reason to give up hope at any stage.I am sure you know about these books--but two that I like and have turned to during my episodes of illness or that of family members are *Full Catastrophe Living* and *Spontaneous Healing*.Katherine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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