Delicate Topic

[StandUpSitDown]

Okay - lots of us are adults here, so I want to ask an adult question. I am a male, in my 40s, diagnosed with POTS (but no loss of blood pressure standing) - just higher heart rate.

And - after sex - and the attending event during it - for about 30 minutes afterward - it's as if my POTS doesn't exist.

My heartrate doesn't go up much at all - maybe 2 or 3 BPM.

After 30-45 minutes - I'm back to me. Heartrate up about 15-20BPM.

it's to the point that I can predict it, and will actually get up and do stuff around the house because I don't feel as badly as I do normally.

Does anyone else experience this?

Yes, I joke with my wife that doing this is the best medicine - but seriously?

[Lukkychrm42]

That's really interesting. I'd have thought it'd be the opposite... adrenaline rushing and all that. I wonder why? Circulation or something?

[worththewords]

I've always read these topics but no one has ever brought this subject up. The same thing happens to me!

My blood pressure and pulse are actually in the perfect range after and during sex. My pulse will stay around 60-70bpm for a good 30 minutes or so. But then forget it, it gets back up to around 100bpm which is typical for me or higher if I'm feeling POTSy.

I've always wondered what causes this reaction considering I would have expected the complete opposite.

Best medicine, perhaps?

[Sophia3]

Though it's been awhile since I was involved with somebody, sex was a trigger for me.

Sometimes the HR got so high, I thought I was having a heart attack and had to stop. Other times, I had to be sure not to move much or turn over quickly during things.

Also, the ANS is in charge of the trigger that releases the "Big O" and that rarely works for me anymore. Or the feeling is suppressed.

Years and years ago I could control that and let it happen when I wanted to...now, forget about it.

If the ANS if truly messed up, so is the ability to achieve orgasm.

Consider yourself lucky!! All your blood is circulating in all the right spots and at the right times.

[JenniferInOhio]

Interesting. I usually get heart palpitations afterwards.

[AJVDK]

I always get sicker, I fact the next day I know I am going to have a very bad day, I am not sure why but for me it a big trigger. Luckly my husband understands, but I still feel bad. ( in fact I feel bad saying this but the letter my doctor is wirting for SSDI inculdes everything I can not due, and he is listing sex, as I get so sob, tacky, and my b/p goes everywhere)

I have always wanted to ask other, or bring this topic up, but never new what to say, I know it is a delicate topic, and my question is for any of you that it make worse, do you feel bad for you partner? Do you feel like you are not meeting there needs? ( That's how I feel)

[Sophia3]

Since I do not want to offend folks on this site, one can get CREATIVE to help meet the needs of a loved one.

Also, sometimes if you can figure out a way to lie on your side and not move much, it can help keep the tachycardia at bay. I was involved with an older guy so he wasn't into acrobats or sudden changes in direction like some folks are!?

Sometimes, if having a good day, there are ways to um, get thru it.. I think counseling with a therapist can be critical for some people so the spouse doesn't see the illness as "an excuse" and to understand. Also the therapists can help for creative ideas.

BUT make sure the therapists THINKS LIKE YOU DO and understands YOUR VALUE SYSTEM. What goes on behind closed doors is nobody's business but YOU as the patient should NEVER be asked to do something you do not want to do.

You need to feel safe. That's all I can say on this topic w/o embarrassing myself or somebody else!?

p.s. I only brought up the therapist suggestion as I know of some way too sick to even attempt sex. and that TRULY takes team work to get through that problem w/o causing resentments.

[StandUpSitDown]

This is an extremely interesting set of responses. And like I said we are all adults, we know where babies come from, and this is a physical activity that puts unique stresses on the system - and it isn't "just like exercise" - unless exercise arouses you.

So.... there is something to learn here, that perhaps we need to let doctors get clued in over - because NOBODY is going to get funding for a study of this...

At least there is one other person "like me" - which is good to show that there is SOMETHING to what I believe.

For all we know, we may be discovering a very SIMPLE way to distinguish between different types of POTS.

I do know that at orgasm, there are huge releases of chemicals which affect how the sympathetic nervous system behaves.

Now..... who here has contact with a decent doctor that can think about this?

We shouldn't get embarassed about this. Sex is a vital part of living, and if some of you have real problems with it due to POTS, what better place to get advice.

We may have problems with our autonomic nervous systems, but we still have gonads and hormones - and if all of us can help each other cope with that reality and make it better for us.... well, I have to tell you - it sure helps lifestyle more than figuring out how to sit up at a straight-back chair long enough to eat a meal in a fancy restaurant.......

Seriously.

[calypso]

Could it be possible that you are just more relaxed due to the release of ... well, you can fill in the blank.

I would think that our bodies are happiest when we are happiest -- even for a moment. And that the endorphins that get released during sex could play into your feeling better. Just a non-medical guess.

Amy

[StandUpSitDown]

If relaxation could reduce my heart rate and keep it from rising when standing, I would be first in line to purchase the biofeedback tapes at the bookstore.

Unfortunately, for many of us here, the disease causes the anxiety, not the other way around.

And I've yet to find a way to, through mental control, to lower the delta between supine and standing heart rate.

And I am pretty good at the mind over body stuff. I can pretty much block out pain, relax my way out of headaches, etc.

There's something in the bloodstream post-orgasm which is making me feel better, and I want to know what it is.

[Guest CyberPixie]

How do you know if your BP etc are ok during?! Do you say, 'hang on a min while I take my BP'?! LOL

For me, I get very tachy and breathless and the week after I can hardly breathe, feel like I've been hit by a truck and just awful. So it doesnt make me better.

Thats interesting about the ANS controlling the big O, I've never had a problem with this, not sure if it's suitable for me to post but edit it if you must, I find that it's every 30 secs if you get my drift and extremely powerful. I was wondering whether this is due to the fact that if our nerves are damaged and we feel pain more, wouldn't this also mean we'd feel the big O more?

[Lukkychrm42]

I think calypso meant a physical relaxation of the body (and thus possibly the ANS), rather than a relaxed state of mind... that for a brief moment after the huge chemical release of an orgasm, maybe all chemical activity slows, and therefore the body is in a true state of rest. I don't think the intention was to suggest that POTS symptoms could be controlled through willpower.

I don't know about others here, but I don't judge how I'm feeling by what the monitor says. So if I'm feeling great, I'm not going to worry about what my blood pressure is. If I'm feeling crappy, I might take a reading, and that might point to something askew with the ANS or whatever else.

I tire easily, but I don't really have any problems as long as, well, if it's going to take a while, I'm in some position that's mostly horizontal. Afterwords, I mostly get palpitations.

[StandUpSitDown]

Do you say, 'hang on a min while I take my BP'?! LOL

Actually - yes. My wife and I are both somewhat fascinated by this so - yeah, a couple of times I started with the blood pressure cuff attached to my arm and then, in the midst of things, my wife would press the button on the BP monitor, and *freeze* - I'd be very still and let it get checked.

And I have a heart monitor strap that I can wear around my chest, and my laptop computer will take continual heart readings from it. We've monitored them throughout and it is as if I feel a shudder - that I hadn't felt before POTS - and then my heart rate goes a huge step down after that shudder.

And it stays down for 30 minutes, then starts crawling back up.

In other words, we're both fascinated by this result - and actually have tried to get some reasonable data about it all.

There is something going on chemically that is helping me. I'd bet money on that. Because even when falling asleep, with that monitor on, my heart rate doesn't go down to these levels. Not at all....

[Dizzy Dame]

I actually become bradycardic after my "big O", I've measured my pulse on several occasions and it ranges from 30-50 bpm for a few mintues (resting of course), then balances back out to the 70's. It's wierd but not very worrying since it only lasts a minute or two.

I'd be interested to learn what happnes to a "normal" persons HR after climax.

[worththewords]

I'd be interested to learn what happnes to a "normal" persons HR after climax.

I've always noticed that my fiance's heart is beating really fast, which is why I thought it was so strange that my HR was normal for once.

This led us to breaking out the blood pressure machine afterwards and realizing that my pulse and BP stay normal for awhile while his is up and swinging. I've never checked it during though. Something about a blood pressure cuff around my arm just seems like a mood killer to me..

[morgan617]

I know in shy-drager and the really progressive forms we lose the ability to achieve orgasm. I am guessing a nerve degeneration thing.

Sex makes me sick as a dog. It never makes me feel better or my heart rate go down or my bp. And I used to be ill for a couple days after. My hubs says nothing is worth making someone feel that miserable.

For those of you that tolerate it well, and it helps, I think that's great. I have no idea what the thinking would be about why it would "normalize" some people temporarily and and make others so much worse. It's an interesting subject. I don't believe I've seen any literature from any of the top guys on this.

But then I don't look for that particular stuff anymore. I figure if I can survive a shower, I'm doing well, let alone acrobatics in bed. I would think it would have to be a hormonal thing, but with all we know about that, we know next to nothing.

I'm not ruling out a psychological component either, in that sex is very different to men than it is to women. I'm sure there are plenty of women out there with high sex drives, but there seem to be a lot more men who, if on their death bed, would still be ready for it. It's the brunt of jokes all the time. Maybe it's a testosterone thing, a release of that, whereas women have far less of that particular hormone in their bodies.

If I'm not feeling well, it's the last thing I'm going to be thinking about. When I used to work in the hospital, I was amazed that people that were too sick to be at home, were still well enough to go outside and smoke. I guess that's the way I feel about sex. I can't cook anymore, clean anymore, shower daily, work, even go for a ride in a car without getting sick. I am in my chair more and more. I have to tell you, sex is NOT at the top of my list for things I'm interested in. So, in my case I'm sure there's a psych component that says, will this half hour or whatever be worth what I will go through the next few days? The answer is no. And the answer is also no for my husband, bless his faithful heart.

Maybe the doctors haven't really explored this as much as some would like because, like me, they don't imagine people feeling as badly as many of us do, even pondering this. They are more interested in getting us upright in a chair through a dinner than a roll in the hay. It would be interesting for a patient of one of the big guys to just ask about it. Why one person does well and the next feels like it's going to kill them. And do man over all feel better than women during and after? This is a guru question and I just don't see where it's been very explored as of yet. morgan

[Guest dionna]

nope. i get sick.

[dawn]

I no longer have a sex drive at all. I haven't had an orgasm in years. Sex is something that I dread because afterwards I feel so much worse physically. It's like I have run a mile and I really don't exert myself that much.

It causes problems in our marriage.

Dawn

[shayden]

Ok...I am seriously jealous!!! This is a problem I would NOT mind having at all and I think if this would make me feel that much better...let's just say my husband would be a very happy man.

However, I faint every single dang time and it ***** which makes me not want to have sex. I mean if you knew that every single time you got in a car you were going to have a car accident, would you still get in the car???

So my advice to you....stay in bed and keep feeling good! lol

Take Care,

Susan

[bgsu4]

I'm male 33 and I usually feel better also. Your body releases so many chemicals and hormones during and after sex. It could have a different impact on everbody depending on the cause of the POTS. The endorphins released just may make some people feel better. I often wondered if it stimulates the autonomic nervous system and somehows rewires it correctly for some reason.

[Guest CyberPixie]

That's interesting. The men seem to do better but the women suffer. So unfair!