Guest tearose Posted January 29, 2006 Report Share Posted January 29, 2006 Hi everyone! This is actually a second try...I originally posted in chit and chat and as the moderator went to move it into Dysautonomia Discussion it disappeared! (kinda like I disappeared for awhile, eh? )Anyway, hello to all friends, old and new...I will try to remember what I wrote and also I guess I have to learn what goes here and what goes in chit and chat..So, last I posted, I was addressing two of my most problematic dysautonomia symptoms. * For the physical low blood pressure and high heart rate issue: I had been actively using compression from my toes to my waist and sometimes on my torso too. I continued using electrolytes as needed for proper hydration. I began and continued to use Magnesium and Potassium along with daily vitamin and calcium. *To improve mental clarity I had been listening to mozart for the mind, doing puzzles and most amazingly helpful in my opinion...teaching myself how to write and do things with my non dominant hand. (I also was regular enough with floor exercise and walking to maintain conditioning)After about four months of this combined stronger approach I was feeling improved enough to put down my seat cane and get out more. I managed to enroll in a refresher class at the graduate level (I have a masters degree). I managed to land a full time job! The reality of life with my physical challenges was that the "cost" of working full time was too great. I would come home from work and be unable to cook, clean, food shop, post here, email, phone...I had no social life except that one class a week. I was so tired and wiped out that my body would just fall into bed! I am glad I only had class once a week and I did get an A and the greatest gift from this was to see that my brain was firing up again and I felt a big boost to my self esteem.The hard part was that I was kinda forgetful and tired at work, and really it was too much for me. I know I take pride in the fact that I mustered up the courage and willingness to try to work, but I am kinda ashamed that I seem to never learn and am embarrassed to have put myself out there so vulnerably again!Darn it, I try so hard sometimes.I just wanted to see if maybe, just maybe I could do it!I wanted the joy of bringing in some income to my family and have some sense of mature satisfaction that I was a good, contributing member of society. Oh, well. I hope I get over this soon.It gets me frustrated that not only did social security turn me down for coverage, but they never offered to help re-train me to find a way to work with dysautonomia. It just seems so hard and unfair sometimes.Sorry to sound so grumpy right now...it's just that when you have to fight for good medical care, fight for your own place in society....well, thanks for letting me share.Well, now I have to gain my composure and confidence and re figure out what I may be able to do and I think part-time and flex hours are going to be a must!I am sorry to have been away for so long. I never forgot any of you! I know if anyone understands it would be here, that I was totally unable to eek out any energy for anything else at the time. That was a big price to pay, I hope you all are doing okay, and I will certainly come around more now.It hurts to think that I will finally have to admit that a full time job "costs" too much for my physical body. I love being around people so I don't want to work from home...I guess I'm just feeling a bit lost right now.talk to you again soon,tearose Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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