rehabilitation centre is coming closer

[corina]

As some of you might know, my pt and pcp advised me a stay in a rehab centre to get more strength and learn live my life with a chronic illness. At first i decided not to do that because i don't want to leave my family (it will probably take about 6 months) for such a long time and i think my boys (11 and 14) can't miss me around. Also, my husband doesn't look forward to work 40 hours a week and run the family all by himself. But some time ago my pt told me that i really should think about it because my health and strength are getting worse adn there's nothing left she can do for me.

So now i decided to give it a try but i feel so very sad about it, as i don't want to leave my home and family. tomorrow i will have the first interview and a psychological test and in 10 days there will be another interview and i think they will let me know if they can take me. As you all know, there's little known about pots and they don't have protocols for this.

I am so very scared (i hate to be with all strange people and doctors who don't understand or don't know how to treat pots) but i know that if i want to get the best out of my life i have to do this. And maybe, just maybe i can get some condition and strength back and will be able to do some more. It could help with the back and neck trouble i have because my muscles aren't strong enough to hold me in one piece.

So eventhough i am so scared and sad about leaving my kids and husband, i will do the interview and hope that they will take me, i really wouldn't know what to do if they won't.

Corina

sorry to be so long writing all this.

[MightyMouse]

Corina, your post wasn't that long at all, especially considering the major life change that is facing you right now. I hope that everything works out well and you are able to rebuild some of your stamina and strength and then return home feeling better.

Let us know how the interviews go. Nina

[gwen]

Hi Corina. I ccan't imagine trying to make that decision. My children are older but still its the mama that the world revolves around. Perhaps for that reason, long term it is best for them, if you go. If you get there and realize its not working out you aren't chained there. If you get there and realize it is helping, your family will want you to get as strong as you can. Maybe you won't have to be there 6 mo. just ideas. Is it close by your family so they can visit?, do you get to go out for weekend visits? My prayers are with you as make this decision. I think knowing that you have an out if it isn't working would help.:-)

[Ernie]

Hi Corina,

I know how difficult this situation is on you and your family. I hope everything will turn out for the best.

Ernie

[Laura]

Hi Corina. What a difficult decision for you. I am sure it must be a scary choice to make. Try to stay positive and have a good talk with your family to make a decision that you feel will be the best for everyone. Remember that the people taking care of you there will only be strangers to you for a short while..... Then you will have good friends! Laura

[Jacquie802]

Hi Corina, I get very homesick, so in a sense I can relate to some of your feelings. If there is even the smallest chance it could help, then I would at the very least try it. If it isn't for you, you can leave. If it helps though, think about all the good changes that will be in store for you!! You would actually be able to do more things, not only for yourself but for your family too. Is the rehab center nearby?? Even if it isn't I'm sure your family would visit you as often as they can. As for not knowing anyone there, I'm sure you are going to make friends during your stay. I hope there is an internet there, because we sure will miss you! My advice is to do what is best for you! Keep us updated.

[yogini]

Corina,

Good luck with your interview. It does sound like a hard decision, but I agree with the others. If there is a chance that going will help you to improve, then it sounds like it makes sense to go for it. Now for the most important question: Will you have email there? Because we will all miss you very much if you don't!

-Rita

[DancingLight]

Corina,

How did the interview go???? I have been thinking about you and wondering so much...

This is such a very hard decision! I know how much you love your boys and your husband...and I alos know how much THEY love YOU...and I know that they will support you 100% and while you are away I will hope that learn to cook gourmet meals, clean, do laundry, and keep the house perfect! hahahaha!

Like Rita, I hope you can have internet there b/c we will miss you so much too!!!!!!

Emily

[morgan617]

My husband wants me to go to one, as he is getting so worried. As I have fainted 3 times now with in home physical therapy, he has suggested he just can't help me. I think he is going to tell me he won't take care of me anymore tomorrow.

I think your boys would really miss you, but if it really helped the payback would be so sweet. I'm sure they'd trade 6 months to have a happier healthier mom, but only you can make that decision. Is it far away, or could they visit you often? Please let us know...morgan

[DancingLight]

Corina?

I am getting very worried about you as you haven't logged on since the interview...I am wondering if they admitted you right away? Or if the process was so exhausting that you are in the hole? Or that you were upset b/c they didn't take you? Or soemthing? I am worried....and wanted to let you know that I was thinking about you....

Em

[corina]

thank you so much guys for thinking about me, and yep I'm in a big hole (although i hate to admit that). The rehab centre is a drive of about an hour and this coming monday i will have another interview, they will tell me if they will take me then.

I was very scared to go, but it didn't feel uncomfortable being there, so that's good news. The bad news is, that the waiting time is about 10 months, which is very long for me. I know though, that it is best for my family to get used to the idea of me being gone for some time and work on their household skills . (but since i'm sick for almost 6 years now, my husband cooks dinner, does the shopping and the kids help with the shopping and clean up their own mess. also, we have a housekeepr twice a week, so that helps as well. my husband can do the laundry, the youngest can do the folding and my oldest son can do the ironing. can you believe they actually do all this stuff?!!!!!! i'm so proud of them!!!)

and, we also will have time to go on holidays this summer (i'm not allowed to go while i'm in the centre), so i'm looking into the brochures to find us a nice place (probably in France or Italy). As the warmth makes me feel better, I'm very much looking forward to that.

I'm sorry if I made you worried Em, I didn't mean to but I feel so bad that I hardly move these days. Thanks for thinking about me!

Love, Corina

oh, and morgan, i do think that rehab is best for me because my pt didn't want to work with me anymore because it was irresponsible (as she called it). she has worked with me for about 5 years now and she was the one that told me that rehab would be the last option. Maybe it could work for you too (and others???), wish i could save a place for all of you to try. Wouldn't that be GREAT

Corina

[MightyMouse]

Corina, thank you so much for the update. I was thinking about how it was going for you. Maybe it really is a good thing that you will have so much time to mentally adjust to the idea of being away--I know you & your family will still miss each other, but over the intervening time, it will be good to work on ways of staying close with each other.

does the rehab center have internet? when teri and I have been away from each other that's been a great way to stay in contact for little money... we would leave each other a sweet email either to wake up to in the am, or to find before bedtime. when I was away at NIH for testing, I used their community computer every day that I was able--also, you may recall I used to travel for work and would be away a week or two at time, a few times a month. Staying in contact with family and friends was my only way of staying sane (although all the flying and hours of traveling were brutal on my body--can't do that type of work anymore).

Let us know how things progress. This is a very big step--and I hope a very great step for you. Nina

[Sunfish]

dearest corina -

i could have sworn i wrote a reply when you first posted about your interview but i must have been imagining things so am glad em bumped it back up. i have been thinking of you SO much since reading about your interview, potential plans, etc. and am SO glad that you were able to give us an update.

i can imagine that ten months seems super long but it is wonderful that you will be able to go on holiday with your family. for various reasons i haven't been on a "vacation" in years so must say that i'm a bit jealous! (can i hide away in your suitcase??) a lot of times places give a generous approximation too so you never know...it could end up being sooner than ten months (though hopefully not before your trip of course!)

i can't imagine how tough the decision must be for you though am glad that you felt okay about your first interview. and while an hour isn't super close i'm guessing that it's close enough that your family will be able to visit some? and like others have said i of course hope you'll have some internet access?! for your sake and selfishly for ours

your family sounds wonderful and i'm sure that makes things easier and harder. easier b/c you know that they are capable of taking good care of themselves as they already help out so very much but harder b/c you'll miss them so much more.

you've got me thinking that maybe someday there will be a rehab centre just for us dysautonomiacs....wouldn't that be something?

i'm sorry that you're feeling so crummy right now but thank you so much for checking in with us. i'm sending you love & hugs & happy thoughts from across the ocean.

melissa

p.s. i'll be thinking of you during your next appt next week:-) i hope it goes well.

[MomtoGiuliana]

corina

Just want you to know I am thinking of you--and your strong spirit. This is a major decision and commitment for you and your family, with no guarantee that it will help. But, it sounds like it could really help you, and I am so glad this option is available to you. I hope you will have internet and other communication media available to you, if you go--that will be so important to maintaining your family connections and your connections to the outside world--and us!

Your kids and husband sound wonderful, by the way.

Take care,

Katherine

[AJVDK]

I wish you the best of luck. I hope that this gives you time to get use to the idea of being gone. I also hope that once you get into the rehabilitation center things will start getting better for you.

Good Luck!

Amy

[ariella]

Hi Corina,

Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you. What do your children say about this? What a hard decision. I remember being minutes after a spinal tap, laying on my back, while mediating some kind of sibbling squabble on the phone...Youv'e got so much spirit, I really hope they can help you.

Love, ariella

[Guest Mary from OH]

Corina-

I'm relieved that you were comfortable at the rehab center. That's a plus since it's such a difficult decision. Perhaps you could get the internet and use one of those little cameras one at the rehab center and one at home, that way you could talk and see your family every day for "free". You can go through MSN or Yahoo as long as you have the equipment on your computer, you just need internet access. Just an idea. The cameras are very reasonable now too.

I wish you the best in making your decision. I know your family will be supportive in whatever decision you will make!! Take care and keep us posted!! And DON'T fall into any holes!! It's not allowed!! I have a rope around your waist to pull you out before you get in too far, OK?!! Take care, my dear friend!!