Jump to content

Where has POTS Taken You Spiritually


janineerrn
 Share

Recommended Posts

Hi,

I am sitting here and I hurt all over, my bp is low and I feel like I weigh a ton etc....

Where has pots taken you spiritually? Not talking religion here.

I have been doing Yoga and meditation for a while now. The meditation takes me away from my body. i found out something very interesting. The connection to God/Spirit is inside of us. Looking outward for God/Spirit is pointless. is like a radio frequency you have to tune into. i discovered it quite by acciident.

I was so angry spiritually, lost. i was raised Chritian, I pray. But i have made my inner self, my spirituality a priority, exploring myself on the inside (since I spend so much time laying down).

With out POTS i never would have had the time to experience this. (no Im not nuts, well I am but i hope someone understands this).

I would like to know where you are spiritually. This is a hard one and I understand if you dont want to share but, i belive the spirit needs healing as well as the body and mind.

What do you think? I think its a great topic and we should be able to express ourselves honestly with out being afraid of attack. Everyone has a differnt set of beliefs. Please respect that when you answer this topic. i hope everyone feels safe enough to contribute.

Does anyne do dream logs?

Peace

Janine

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I used to have such a great deal of faith. In myself, in God, in people.

After I got sick and no one knew what was wrong, and then I started getting all those psych diagnoses, I lost all my faith. In myself, in God, and in people. My soul felt like a black hole.

Then as time progressed I realized, this is just my journey. I can be bitter, angry, and hurtful, or I can deal with it and grow from it. There are still times I have shaken my fist and said, "why me" but then I realize, why not me?

I feel better when my faith is intact, in myself, in God, and in people. For those that do not understand, are cold, mean and unforgiving of weakness, I believe their final lessons will be hard. And not my problem...Wish I could be more profound, but that's it. When it all comes down to it, I have myself to deal with, and I don't want to be looking at an angry, bitter, unhappy person. morgan

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Janine

I think this is a great topic to discuss. For myself, I feel contented and at peace spiritually. I have had health issues on and off most all of the my life and not as healthy as alot of other people that have been around me during my lifetime and I think because feeling badly alot of the time is my norm; I feel it has taught me to look at the lighter side of things and appreciate life in a different viewpoint.

My now adult children also have had a great deal of genetic health problems to contend with in their lifetime as well. We like others have definetly been through the wringer at times. They also have seemed to adopt this outlook, I think pretty much anyway. It is our norm so we accept it and go on with what ever we can whenever we can. Sure, we do get frustrated when we would like to do things instead of having downtime or are facing setbacks yet again, but it beats the alternative in my eyes.

When younger, I use to wonder why things were like they were, but it was more of wanting answers for things rather than the why-me type of thing. After finding out answers for our health issues it took a great deal of weight off and gave me acceptance. Plus, I learned to just let go of the 'keeping up with the normal people' without feeling guilty. Guilt is a big anchor and does no one any good. I do not blame God for our health issues or feel mad at him that we have them...I just figure it's part of living and it can always be worse in many ways. I feel personally that having these issues has given me wisdom, and a inner strength to overcome.

The only thing that really bothers me is that I have given these problems to my girls to deal with...that I do wish wasn't the case. It has been the hardest thing for me, watching them deal with setbacks etc due to their health issues. I tend get a powerless feeling during those times that I do not like. But, when they succeed at something that they have worked harder for because of their health issues, than most people around them, It makes my heart soar. I have alot of admiration for their young spirit and strong will.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since this illness struck Aug 2004. I have grown spirituality in ways I never dreamed of.

When I was first sick I was soo angry and wondered how God could let this happen to a young mother of 3 little ones. That this illness is not only affecting my life but my kids are feeling the impact and I was hurt and bitter and resentful.

But than when I was at the end of my rope, been through all the antidepressants (all made me sicker) and I was thinking about taking my own life I realized I will not teach my kids how to give up or let them think I gave up on them. Well at that point I needed to start doing some soul searching looking for inner strength to fight for the next day.

That's when I asked for God to walk besides me through this journey and provide guidance and strenght through him.

I still have a hard time accepting the fact I was a healthy young mother one day than a sick young mother the next. But I see alot of good that came from my illness. Through my suffering my family has found the Lord and we're in a happier place because of it.

I want to feel better but it's just not my time, I still struggle with this alittle bit but I now accept that through God all things are possible.

My faith gives me hope, comfort, strength, wisdom and the ability to look for the good through my personal storm.

Thanks for posting this

Dayna

Link to comment
Share on other sites

HI.

I have been sick since I was little. I guess I always thought the one 'person' who did understand me was G-d and that even though I could not figure out why He put me here, cause I obviously am not cut out for it...He must know, I figured...

When I was little and would feel so bad and would feel like I was spinning or rocking when still I used to pretend G-d was rocking me. lol I used to pretend, when I was in the hospital that He was right there holding my hand too... (my mom liked the footprints prayer and I think it went to my head. )

In high school when I was bed ridden for nearly two years I hit bottom. I figured that it would be a load off my family if they came home from work and found me gone. It scared me and I prayed like crazy...amazingly that whole overwhelmed feeling I had left instintaneously.

G-d and I are good friends now, no matter what I think of what he dishes me out some days. One could say best friends, I tell him everything, we fight sometimes, I cry on His shoulder and make up....lol, but in the end our relationship is darn firm.

Edited by hmichel
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have decided this is my journey from being an a type personality and having to learn patience. this is slowing me down for some reason. I used to think I was patient but this has put a new definition on it. I do believe G-d or fate has something in store for me, my life has been too unusual up to now to get an ordinary med problem. I believe there is a saying" whether bidden or not, G-d is there" . I think this is my story and while I may not like the chapter, it has many more. Patience. One moment, one hour, one day at a time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Where has this taken me spiritually? I had to think about this a long time before responding because it's not an easy answer. I've learned more about myself through this than I could have otherwise. I struggle, I fight, I cry, I wish and I question and yet the one thing that has not been shaken is my faith in God's goodness and my future with Him.... but I have questioned the purpose for my life. And I have found deep spiritual answers - that even with suffering and losses, there is purpose in my living every day.

I have also been led to ask questions that I had never thought about before and I think that as I ponder these questions, I am becoming better equipped to someday help others who will be asking the hard questions. I want to be ready and understand everything now, but I realize a spiritual journey is just that - a journey and I can't get to the end of it without traveling it the whole way.

I cry and ask God to take this suffering away and to heal me and at the same time I am thankful for some of the amazing things that have resulted from my being sick and for all the things I am learning.

~Roselover

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...