Linj10 Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 The last week I have taken what seems like a turn for the worst. I was doing great, feeling much better and back to normal, excersising, and all around happy....I went to the beach with my fiancè and his family this last week and on Friday I plummeted out of control. I had a total breakdown with the feelings of anxiety and doom. My headaches have come back to the point where I take 3 Tylenol at least twice or three times a day bc I cannot function, my hands and feet are going numb especially when I'm asleep, my heart feels like is skipping a beat, I feel depressed and so anxious that I can not control my crying, and I'm snapping at everyone. Given I am more stressed than I've ever been in my life. I'm in nursing school and finishing up a quarter, trying to plan a wedding with families who aren't really concerned with what I want but their needs, my mom and I constantly butting heads, venues I do decide on being booked or having complications, and a family feud right now. I just do not feel like I know this person or that I'm even me, I feel like I'm having out of body experiences where I'm justice who are you and by are you acting this way. I feel empty, guilty, and depressed and all I do is cry. Has anyone else ever been through this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBlonde Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 I'm so down right now, I can't make a post, but I just want to tell you that yes, I know exactly how you feel and I am so very sorry you are going through this... (((hugs))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jpjd59 Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 Wow - nursing school, planning a wedding and not feeling well. I don't know how you do it. It seems like this condition goes in waves - you just think you see some improvement and then BAM the symptoms come back (in my daughter's case the symptoms came back even worse than before). I'm not surprised that your emotions are all over the place. The havoc that this condition wreaks on your body causes norepinephrine, etc. to be out of whack. My daughter, who was usually a really easy going person, now has emotions that are out of control. Try and lessen whatever stress that you can in your life - perhaps that will make you feel a little better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mytwogirlsrox Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 Hi,I just wanted to Share my experience with you, the more stress I'm under the more anxiety I have. I've never had anxiety before POTS, but since my diagnosis I get a lot of the physical anxiety symptoms (numbness, tingling, head aches, tight throat, urgency to pee, shortness of breath, joint pain, derealization etc there is a huge list of possible symptoms all of which sound like I have a hideous disease) but my symptoms disappeared after my anxiety reduced with an SSRI. I don't know what your interest is in an SSRI, but you could try one and see if it helsps or try googling anxiety reducing techniques. Maybe see if meditation works or my therapist recommended making a soothing music play list for when i get too stressed, waterfall or rain etc is very soothing. I don't want to discredit Pots and the hormones that cause anxiety, (meaning physiological vs psychological) but regardless of how they are released, they're still the same hormones that cause panic disorder, generalized anxiety disorder etc.. Here is a list of anxiety symptoms http://www.anxietycentre.com/anxiety-symptoms.shtml Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mytwogirlsrox Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 I forgot to add that I'm super jealous that your in nursing school!!! I'm applying in sept for the spring semester I really want to get in! I'm kinda nervous though with my newly acquired POTS & NCS diagnosis that school will be so hard for.me but I'm really excited to hear that you got in, and your doing it! Yay for all us POTSYS you give me hope that I can do it too!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AllAboutPeace Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 Linj & McBlonde, I'm so sorry that you both are going through this right now. I think we have all felt what you are feeling to one degree or another, so please know that you are not alone in any of it - there is a whole group of people here who understand how tough this is. You will find your strength again but until then you can borrow some from the rest of us.(((hugs))) The extremes of Pots can definitely affect what we say and do at times, but always remember that you are soo much more than this illness. I know a song isn't going to make it better, but here is one that I like to listen to when I'm overwhelmed with Pots - so if you are up for a listen... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBlonde Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 wow.... AllAboutPeace, thank you for responding! When I posted the extinct of sadness I was feeling yesterday in that thread and then got no response, I felt worse... I have got to do something.. I just don't know what to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lifeless Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 ** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jpjd59 Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 wow.... AllAboutPeace, thank you for responding! When I posted the extinct of sadness I was feeling yesterday in that thread and then got no response, I felt worse... I have got to do something.. I just don't know what to do. McBlonde:So sorry to hear you were feeling down. Hopefully today is a better day for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBlonde Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 wow.... AllAboutPeace, thank you for responding! When I posted the extinct of sadness I was feeling yesterday in that thread and then got no response, I felt worse... I have got to do something.. I just don't know what to do. McBlonde:So sorry to hear you were feeling down. Hopefully today is a better day for you.Thank you so much! I'm trying to force myself to "get a grip" and stop sounding like a whiny baby!! Ugh! I hate POTS! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roxie Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 I'm sorry you guys are having a hard time. Ive had a down day too. I feel very left out & like everyone my age is moving on & having good things going for them and I have POTS/EDS ruling. Its torture listening to my brother and all the options he has in getting out of the military on a few months & locations he could get a job when still at home with my parent trying to get through the day.I'm sorry I don't have better words of advice but I know how you guys feels Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBlonde Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 I'm sorry Ihatebananas! That so true! I think my downward sadness spin started last week. My niece was getting married out of town... In the background, I listened to my friends and family making plans for a fun get together....but there was just no way I could even think of a way to go... Something so simple is so hard. POTS may not be life threatening, but it sure is life altering>> to the sidelines watching.... Big hugs to all! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brethor9 Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 all I can say is I am right there with all of you......sending strength, courage and hugs to you all and hoping we all pull out of this downward spiral soonBren Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roxie Posted June 18, 2012 Report Share Posted June 18, 2012 Yeah, seeing other people move forward is hard for me bc I feel perpetually stuck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linj10 Posted June 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 Nursing school hasn't been an easy war to wage. I never could understand why I couldn't remember information...so I'm in my 5th year.I have a feeling of sheer panic almost. I have to have everything precisely planned out or I will have a panic attack because I feel like I'm loosing control. Everything is worst case scenario....anyone can say somethin to me and I aUtomatically think they hate me or are judging me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bellgirl Posted June 19, 2012 Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 It sounds as if you have way too many concerns all together, and have POTS at the same time. Being a nurse, I can't even begin to imagine going to school for nursing and planning a wedding at the same time and a family feud, too, even when I was "normal"!! You have way too much on your plate. So sorry you are going through this. Does anyone in your family realize that what you need is help, instead of bickering? Does anyone understand your POTS issues? I hope you have a supportive fiance. I'm praying for you, and am sorry you are going through this. Please let us know how this situation turns out. It looks like you are on medication to help you...this should be a happy occasion...please ask for help from someone, you know you can depend on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linj10 Posted June 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 My fiancé is great and super supportive of what he can understand...Our mothers on the other hand...I'm an only child so my mom's super involved in the wedding and just gets upset if I say differently an his mom isn't all that easy to talk to so its super stressful trying to please everyone.My aunt and uncle obviously don't care enough to not cause problems in our family and my aunt by marriage just laughed at my diagnosis. Not a real nice lady. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaos Posted June 19, 2012 Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 AllAboutPeace- Really liked the song. Thanks for the link! It's hard to stay in the "now" but when I don't it, gets WAY too discouraging..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBlonde Posted June 19, 2012 Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 Just wanted to check and see how you are today Linj10?Thinking of you and everybody else that have expressed themselves on this thread and is going through a bad time time right now! xoxoxo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linj10 Posted June 20, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 20, 2012 My mom and I had a major blow out tonight. I got hysterical bc I cannot control my nervous system and he told me my sickness was no different from anyone else's and to suck it up...Needless to say I equalled for a while and got so depressed.We apologized but still I know she doesn't understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBlonde Posted June 20, 2012 Report Share Posted June 20, 2012 Sorry to hear that! There is no way you can just "suck it up" with POTS.... I know that 1st hand. Do you have a good doctor? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jpjd59 Posted June 20, 2012 Report Share Posted June 20, 2012 My mom and I had a major blow out tonight. I got hysterical bc I cannot control my nervous system and he told me my sickness was no different from anyone else's and to suck it up...Needless to say I equalled for a while and got so depressed.We apologized but still I know she doesn't understand.Linj10:Sorry to hear you are having such a rough time. I have a 23 year old daughter who also has POTS. We had a "blow out" last night also. She always tells me that I don't understand and she's right, she is the one with the illness, but it is also hard for parents to watch their children be sick and sometimes we say things out of frustration that we don't mean. Hopefully today will be a better day for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bellgirl Posted June 20, 2012 Report Share Posted June 20, 2012 All families have disagreements, but our nervous systems, seem to escalate ours, though, but we all still love one another, and that is what counts over all. Apologies and forgiveness are important...and life goes on.... Try to enjoy your wedding and the planning, because you want fond memories of your love for one another. That's what matters the most. Of course, you want a beautiful dress, wonderful celebration with new husband, friends and family, and plenty of pictures!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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