firewatcher Posted September 6, 2009 Report Share Posted September 6, 2009 The last several weeks have shown me that there is truly rock at the "bottom," and I can either sit there and bang my head against it or find another way.I have modified the "Serenity Prayer" for my new lifestyle:God grant me the serenity:To accept the things I cannot do.The energy to do the things I can.And wisdom to know the difference and the grace to forgive myself.I have tried to take care of myself, my family, my house, my yard and my work and done none of it well. I have decided to pare down and live more simply. There will be a slow accumulation of unnecessary things in the garage in preparation for ebay or a garage sale. Anything I have not worn, used or needed in the last three years will leave my life unless it has incredible sentimental value AND fits into a 40 inch square box with like items. Slowly my husband and I (for we have agreed to this together) will prepare our home for a better real estate market and potential sale to a single level home with a yard that comes with a yard service. I will no longer attempt to have pets or houseplants. When energy is so finite, it must be focused to be effective, so it is time to clean the lens.Wish me luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawg Tired Posted September 6, 2009 Report Share Posted September 6, 2009 Good for you! I know it is ot easy to do, but you have ade an important first step - and that is the hardest thing to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juliegee Posted September 6, 2009 Report Share Posted September 6, 2009 You need to lead a seminar, Jennifer. I love to think that when we throw away all of the crap we accumulate, we make room for good things to come into our lives. You are a living example. You motivate me!Julie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gertie Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Good luck! I'm glad you have the support of DH. I've struggled for years with the same issues you mentioned. I feel like everything is collapsing around me. Since I'm a senior I don't have the energy left to start over & DH does not want to move & I can't afford to by myself so I'm stuck. From past experience I think you're doing the right thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
futurehope Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Firewatcher,You sound reality based. That's always a good place to be. Best wishes and success on your new path. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janey Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Hi Firewatcher, you are so right! When energy is low, it has to be focused to be effective! I really needed to hear that as it's so relevant to my life too right now!Janey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ramakentesh Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 sometimes you just have to wait it out - and sometimes it feels like its not going to improve but is usually does. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest tearose Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 I hear you!Oh the things we dream of doing...we want to do things and the body just doesn't move. We are physically still while our mind takes us to places of what might be if only...And sometimes we leap and we manage to fly...And sometimes we leap and we fall flat on our face...so I like especially the "grace to forgive ourself" because in us, we just never know and we keep on trying...We want to believe in better... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firewatcher Posted September 7, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 sometimes you just have to wait it out - and sometimes it feels like its not going to improve but is usually does.I can't help but think that if things are less complicated, messy, cluttered, etc. while I wait, that the waiting part will be less frustrating! I know things improve, but the stumbles are both mentally and physically frustrating. I used to love to do yard work, build rock walls, garden...but now it is both physically damaging and frustrating. If 40 minutes of weeding causes my fingers to swell for 24 hours, during which they are practically useless, then that needs to go! I can hope that things get better, but I have to plan for things to stay the same. At least that way I'll get more done when I do feel better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EarthMother Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Isn't it funny where we get stuck in our own story? As I read your grace filled plan on sustainability within a life limiting illness ... I was inspired by your courage and keen insight into ways that will improve your the quality of your life. I silently bowed my head with each decision you recounted ... then saw No Pets and just stopped in my tracks and started back peddling trying to think of some way you could add a tiny furry friend back into the mix. Silly what things trip us up and reel us back into story.It is excellent that you are thinking ahead, and the feng shui of throwing away will bring amazing new opportunities into your life. I would urge you tho to GO SLOW and be mindful of any longings that may come up down the line. The rocks along our path may only seem too heavy to move in the moment ... but holding on to some dreams can give us wings to sculpt the stone in time.Let your heart have the final word. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firewatcher Posted September 7, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Isn't it funny where we get stuck in our own story? As I read your grace filled plan on sustainability within a life limiting illness ... I was inspired by your courage and keen insight into ways that will improve your the quality of your life. I silently bowed my head with each decision you recounted ... then saw No Pets and just stopped in my tracks and started back peddling trying to think of some way you could add a tiny furry friend back into the mix. Silly what things trip us up and reel us back into story.It is excellent that you are thinking ahead, and the feng shui of throwing away will bring amazing new opportunities into your life. I would urge you tho to GO SLOW and be mindful of any longings that may come up down the line. The rocks along our path may only seem too heavy to move in the moment ... but holding on to some dreams can give us wings to sculpt the stone in time.Let your heart have the final word.EM-I so desperately want a dog, but can't tolerate the allergy shots that would allow me to get one. I had a lovely dog, but as he grew older I had to distance myself from him due to my allergy. Then it became difficult to walk with him. I will continue with my shots in hope of someday having a furrier companion than my husband! With my boys at the ages they are, school and outside activities would rob me of the time to care for a pet. I am soft-hearted enough (and SPCA volunteer experienced enough) to know that if I don't have the time, it is not appropriate to have the pet.Hoping to find my Zen... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rymac Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Good luck to you! I can relate to dealing with clutter and all the stuff you don't use. I got rid of a lot of stuff when I moved. Sometimes I wanted to toss everything. Moving and storing stuff you don't use on a regular basis is a pain. Especially when you don't have the energy to use it or take care of it.Here is hoping you can lead the simple life.bluesman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
potsgirl Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 I am 100% behind your statement of "I can hope that things get better, but I have to plan on things staying the same". So true! We've been dealing with that lately with finances and other life changes that are coming our way. I don't want to set myself up for a fall, so I plan things realistically as they are right now, and hey, if something better happens down the line, than terrific. If not, at least we're prepared, and that gives me peace of mind. Good luck in your changing to a more simple life. I bet it gives you a lot of happiness.Cheers to you and your courage - and husband!Jana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EarthMother Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 if I don't have the time, it is not appropriate to have the pet.Hoping to find my Zen...Of course, of course. It was MY mental story that tripped, not your reality. My hairless dogs (not to mention hairless cat) are my life line ... but that's just me.Your Zen my dear has never been in better form. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janiedelite Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Wow! Only those of us who have had to face the limitations imposed upon us by illness know how much courage you are exhibiting. Energy IS such a precious commodity for us. I'm glad you have the support of your family, and I'm sure they'll appreciate the simpler life in exchange for mom having a bit more energy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mountain girl Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Best of luck to you. I am personally not one to have clutter and extra "stuff" but my daughter is and I know how hard it is for her sometimes to part with things. However, you are right, cleaning and everything just seems so much easier when there is less stuff. We recently moved to allow me to be closer to my work and town, whereas before we lived in the country and had to drive further for everything. It has been a big help for me. We also chose a house where everything I need is on one level including laundry area which has been great, so I think you are thinking realistic. We sold our house for a good price even though alot of others were not selling so my thought was maybe it was meant to be, so you could always try and see what happens. I'm sure different parts of the country vary according to real estate. Has it been hard for you to find different things to enjoy since you liked gardening so well? It has been hard for me to make the necessary lifestyle changes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pat57 Posted September 8, 2009 Report Share Posted September 8, 2009 I've been doing that quite a few years now. It started when my boss moved and I saw how too much stuff was a big burden. Then my mother went into a nursing home and I cleared a lot of her stuff out. I didn't want to wait til I was as old as they - and unable to do it. So I've been "purging" for 8 years.This August I put my house up for sale and worked esp hard to declutter. The house did sell and now, like you, I will be down sizing. Major issues for me are yard work and stairs in the house. I can't wait to be in my new clean space with so much less work needed to keep up.Good luck....How long have you been in that home? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.