tinkerbella Posted February 24, 2010 Report Share Posted February 24, 2010 My room mate for the past year died from the infusion clinic and my mom is getting ready to go in hospice. I'm feeling very, very sad this evening. I'm lost my indepence to go anywhere without depending on others. I want to be with my mom tonight. I hope she can hang in till my daughter can bring me there. Any prayers at this time would be really appreciated. ThanksBellaMia~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RIfainthearted Posted February 24, 2010 Report Share Posted February 24, 2010 My room mate for the past year died from the infusion clinic and my mom is getting ready to go in hospice. I'm feeling very, very sad this evening. I'm lost my indepence to go anywhere without depending on others. I want to be with my mom tonight. I hope she can hang in till my daughter can bring me there. Any prayers at this time would be really appreciated. ThanksBellaMia~Bella- If you need a ride I can give you one.My prayers are with you. I will email you my #. Suz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoGiuliana Posted February 24, 2010 Report Share Posted February 24, 2010 I'm so sorry you are facing such sadness and loss right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MommytoSJEA Posted February 24, 2010 Report Share Posted February 24, 2010 ((((((HUGS))))))) and prayersKelli Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lauralulu Posted February 24, 2010 Report Share Posted February 24, 2010 ((((((HUGS))))))) and prayersKelliFrom me as well xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
potsgirl Posted February 24, 2010 Report Share Posted February 24, 2010 I couldn't have said it any better....You're always there for everyone else, Bella, I'm praying for you as always, and sending you love and strength! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayjay Posted February 25, 2010 Report Share Posted February 25, 2010 Hang in there Bella.... I am praying for you and your family. take care of yourself. sent with love- kayjay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinkerbella Posted February 26, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 26, 2010 Thank you friends for your sweet kind prayers and support at this difficult time. My daughter and sister will leave on Saturday as I had some pressing Dr. appointments made and felt that I had some time. Then today I was feeling angry when an email arrived this morning saying my mom had already had 3 mini strokes in the past month and a respiitory infection on top of all of that. I felt I should have been told so I could have gone to see my mom before she got so badly confused from the strokes. Now, I my stuff my anger and let my mom have her time to pass in peace. Step back , and let go of all of this for now.I need to go and get fluids badly tomorrrow and I found out yesterday that my retional cyst has a macular hole??? and the doctor was very upset saying this is not good, I do not like what I see at all and she is one of the top retional specialist in Boston. She rattled off one disease after another asking if I had it. I could hardly process what she said with all that is going on plus my Brain Fog.After all the photos of my eye were taken and I had to rush to meet my cab. I left with two names written down to ask my doctor aboutl Luckily I was going to my cardio today. One was ASCVD, Arerial sclorisis, my cardio said I've been checked for that but, when he listened to my heart today it was out of control. I told him it was due to finding out about my mom this morning having had 3 mini strokes, going into hospice. Still he made me have an ekg right then and said we'll start blood work today and follow up. I'm allergic to statins, they make me look like I've run a marathon. He said somethings about meds and then something about some other meds that insurance (Mine) won't cover and it's very expensive and I'm poor. I'm more worried about my eye, they say they are the windows to the soul. That looking into one's eye that they can dx illnesses. I'm so angry at myselt that I put my eyes on hold for 5 years and so much dammage has been done. So when you start seeing white sparks don't just assume it's snow. Go to the eye doctor. If you see and double vision, graying, lose any vision with migranes go to the doctor. I'm so sorry. She seemed very upset the eye doctor and said this would be out of her hands now. She would call on Friday with more details, so meanwhile start working on finding out if you have these conditions because your arteries are very narrowed in your eye and I don't like what I see.Suddenly everything I looked at became more precious to me. Today I told my cardio I'm just tired of going from place to place and being toyed with. I just want to be fixed from head to toe and not be broken anymore. I'm very, very, very tired. He's so sweet and understanding. I agree to try to take 1/4 more of a pill as I'm so sensitive to the meds and we'll take it from there.Blessings and Love to all,Bellamia~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janiedelite Posted February 26, 2010 Report Share Posted February 26, 2010 You certainly have so many worries right now. I'm sorry to hear about your mom. I'd be angry, too, if my mom had deteriorated in that fashion and I had no notice. Still, I prayed for you that you would have peace and clarity in spite of the many concerns in your life. Wish I could give you a hug in person, as you're always so supportive to all of us. xx, Thankful Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juliegee Posted March 1, 2010 Report Share Posted March 1, 2010 Sweet Bella-You are always there for everyone else. I hate to see you hurting so badly & dealing with so much. If there is a silver lining, it may be that you are blessed to still be able to SEE your precious Mom during this difficult time.I will pray that God keeps your dear Mama in the palm of his hand during her time in hospice & YOU in his other.Gentle Hugs-Julie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinkerbella Posted March 2, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2010 Sweet Bella-You are always there for everyone else. I hate to see you hurting so badly & dealing with so much. If there is a silver lining, it may be that you are blessed to still be able to SEE your precious Mom during this difficult time.I will pray that God keeps your dear Mama in the palm of his hand during her time in hospice & YOU in his other.Gentle Hugs-JulieThanks Jule,that was put so very sweet that it gave me a great feeling of comfort. since our trip got postponed I've been able to talk to my close friend. I'm glad we talked as my mom needs to have her death a celebration of her life just like we celebrate a birth. So with this I'm trying to think of special music to bring to play, songs, bible quotes she liked, stories, things to celebrate her life. massage her hands as she used to love to have me do, and let her know that it's ok to go home when she is ready. I will pass this on to the rest of the family so they can do they same. She will be having hospice care at my sister's so she is lucky to have that. To be with people she knows and her cat that adores her. I'll be going with my 2 young grandchildren and this will be a time to teach that death is part of the life cycle. There is a time for sadness and a time for joy in which both bring tears. Many people never learn how to show their feelings in a healthy fashion and I've tried hard with my own children to teach this.So while mom is on Heaven's Path to join my dad who she says has been standing in her room for sometime now to take her home. This would have been his anniversary date. I will be on my own path of pacing myself, doing what I can, teaching other family members that I am just as important through my actions at this difficult time. And as one life prepares to go another new life has been welcomed into our family on Friday. A new beautiful baby girl, who's mom was in labor for so long while the baby's head was facing up. She was having natural childbirth all the way till the end and then they said she is just not coming out. They tried an epidurial and it would not take, so daddy was sent out of the labor room and mom had to be given anthesia to have the baby.all is well now.So. thank you again I can't tell you how much support I get each time I get another message.love,bellamia~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juliegee Posted March 3, 2010 Report Share Posted March 3, 2010 Bella-How lucky your Mom is to have you. What a beautiful way to celebrate her life! When you finally get there, give your Mom a hug from all of us. Congratulations on the new baby. The circle of life, indeed!I'm keeping you in my prayers-Julie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxine Posted March 5, 2010 Report Share Posted March 5, 2010 BellaMia,You have been so supportive of others, and of course offering your support to me when times get rough. I just wanted to thank you for that, and for just being the kind of compassionate and loving person that you are.Your mother is in good hands though this time of transition to be with her beloved husband.Be extra gentle with youself, and allow hospice to do their thing in helping your mother and the whole family through this.HUGS to you.Maxine :0) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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