blueskies Posted April 6, 2014 Report Share Posted April 6, 2014 Becia, I just like that you went to the track meet. It's living. I have seen my old life become unrecognisable for 12 years now and I deal with depression, anxiety and anger on any day because of this -- I'm having real adjustment problems but am trying to accept. I do know, that on days that I feel up to it, if I make the effort to get out I will feel lighter of heart because of it. I feel like I've participated in life. Lately I think that maybe I haven't been trying to do stuff that I enjoy outside the home as much as I could, perhaps. Although, I do have a young grand-daughter to mind on occasion and although I love her like crazy the responsibility and energy involved is sapping any energy I'd have left to do something just for me that I'd enjoy. blue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Becia Posted April 6, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2014 I know I probably won't be going to another meet for a bit, which bites because I had a great time rooting on these kids I've come to know through everyone around me. Life is definitely different. I sang in church today, first time in ages, and the solo I did was so perfect for my situation. I've asked time and time again for this to be over, to stop the torture, and yet, I keep breathing and going. I'm just about to cry sitting here thinking about it...My therapist is trying to get me involved in some activities, one being a walking group that meets at our YMCA. He talked to the lady leading it and she said I could come roll along if I felt up to it, just to be out and talking to people. I try to do things at church, but often just stay at home where I know my triggers are minimized, any extra energy I can focus towards cooking or school, playing it safe.It just felt so good today to say I'm done for now. Not an easy choice for me to make, keep thinking I should push for more whatever... But I just gotta remind myself, I've come a long long ways since the start. One step forward, two steps back most of the time, but I'm still breathing.And after all I've done today, I so better sleep, lol... Worn out to the max with church activities, lunch with friends, and grocery shopping, I now have cankles a from my feet swelling and pooling, fighting a headache and been really tachy today. I'm done in for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cleo Posted April 7, 2014 Report Share Posted April 7, 2014 For me the hardest part of having pots, not counting the symptoms is sometimes the isolation. I'm fortunate to have my husband and grown children but miss the routine of getting out and seeing people. We took our dog to the vets today and it felt great just to talk to the people who work there. I think its great that you were able to do so much. While pushing ourselves is super taxing it sure is good for our state of mind. :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Becia Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 I weight the pros and cons of going out so much, that sometimes I throw caution to the wind and just go do it. I know I'm gonna pay for it, but like you said Cleo, it's so uplifting to our minds. I have been riding along with my friend Lori when she goes and picks up her lunch (she works outside the home, so often times to escape, she goes out for lunch) just to see something other than the same four walls, no matter where I am in the house.Lately though, I've been taken to staying down in the basement where the home gym is, after my workout for the day, just laying on the couches for a few hours. They are so blooming comfy, it's just wrong, lol. I always end up falling asleep, but lately the weather has been nice, so I've been watching the birds outside the wall of windows and the woods. Keep telling myself someday I'm gonna be back outside with those birds, lol...I'm so worn from this last weekend, that I'm taking the week off from school. I did a quiz Sunday morning since I got up so early, so I'm currently ahead, and tired transcription leads to bad grades with me, lol. It's hard to take it easy knowing I have work that could be done, but my body says it's needed, so I'm trying to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
looneymom Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Hey Becia, if you have a reclining lawn chair I would try sitting out in the early morning or late evening sun. It could still help, if you don't get over heated. I'm looking for a reclining lawn chair for Tyler to help get in more sun. Sunlight is healing if your body can tolerate the tempertures. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Becia Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 We have a screened in back porch, as well as a uncovered porch, that in take full advantage of when the weather is nice... Lately just too cool for me to handle though. It's a change of scenery, just wish I was able to go hike in this nice weather before it gets too hot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gjensen Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Being outside is everything for me. If I could get stable enough to get outside in the mornings, that would be nice. Early morning sun is a mood booster.I have garden(s), but if I did not, I would have to have an aquarium and some potted plants.We are getting ready to remodel our bedroom, and I need to think of ways to bring the outside in. The more I am "outside", the better off I am.I am concerned with how I will handle our southeastern heat and humidity. This will be my first summer with this full blown. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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