a question to all the moms out there

[ArmyNPots]

Hello all,

I have written a few posts, but lately have just struggled so much, it felt ridiculous to post. But now i have a few questions to all the moms with pots out there...

Im 7 months pregnant to a vivacious baby boy, my husband and I are both young (21) and he, as most of you understand, has to take care of me. I have have half bedrest in the military, so i work mon-wed-fri, 4 hour workdays. he feels that it is too much for me and today i went into labor and delivery, where it was thought my beautiful boy was coming early. Thanks to God, it was a false alarm, but it did bring me to thinking about him.

I struggle with the idea my husband feels that he cant leave me alone and that he is constantly worried about me, im wondering if there is a way to hide the condition from my son, so he wont know his mom is "sick" Does anyone have advice on that?

Also does anyone know if he can get POTS? If anyone has any thoughts or input, please let me know as only people that have this condition could truly understand.

[Miriam Poorman-Knox]

The thing that kept me sane during my pregnancies was that I didn't know I had this!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now my baby is 24 and has 2 children my grandsons!!! I got better after a rather difficult pregnancy. The reason I think is that I went back to College and worked on my BS in exercise and sports science. It took 20 years but, I eas exercising almost everyday and walking miles and miles around campus and with my kids. As for your husband, this will always be a concern. Perhaps you could come up with a plan in case you start potsing. As for telling your child this comes with time. Depending on your situation, think about it as one would diabetes. Its necessary in case of emergency or to know what to do if you pass out. This will be many many years down the road. Good luck Miriam

[Ling]

Your husband sounds amazing. What a blessing to have a husband that understands your health and supports you so much. Be happy not all of us have so much support at home. My husband understands but does not support. No matter how sick I am I still have to do everything as if I was healthy. They just don?t get it. I wish he could live in my body for one day then we will see if he does what I must do. As for your son I think it is important that you educated him slowly over the year. I have thought if I have kids I don?t want them to know how bad it really is. I am scared my child might mimic me and say, "I am sick" always. Not understand what he is truly saying of course.

Good luck, wishing you and your baby health over the next 2 months.

I have read girls are more likely than boys to inherit our pots?????

[ethansmom]

Thank goodness your baby boy is staying put for a while You have enough concerns as it is...being a first time mom with POTS can be very overwhelming, but it's great that you have a supportive partner. We were also 21 when our first son was born and now at 23 another boy is on the way. I wasn't sure what to expect with motherhood and POTS combined...there were days I could barely take care of myself, and I was terrified at the thought of having to be responsible for another person. However, it has proven to be the best experience of my life, even with the hard days that we have sometimes. Some more experienced moms on this forum have given me some excellent advice too My biggest fear, especially as Ethan gets older, is that I wouldn't be like all the other moms, or that his childhood would suffer because of me...that he would miss out on all the fun or I wouldn't be able to care for him. He is 2 years old now, and though still very small, I can honestly say that he has not hurt for anything, not one single day in his life. He is surrounded with love, he has lots of fun, lives life to it's fullest, loves everything and everyone he sees, and thinks Mom is the greatest person on Earth (LOL!!). He has more energy than I can handle, but luckily he has an energetic Daddy and two fun, energetic grandparents that live close enough to take him sometimes. There are days when I've had to spend lots of time resting...and he is old enough now that he understands and will just hang out with me reading books, doing puzzles, or watching movies. On days when I am feeling good we go to the park, play outside, and do things that helps get out all his boy energy. My personal choice has been not to hide this from him- I believe that already at two years old his heart is bigger than I could ever imagine. I think it's important for our children to understand what our limits are from the beginning. It is probably easier for a child to be born after we find out we have POTS, this way they never have to make any adjustments to it...it just becomes a part of their life as well as ours. I do sometimes worry about adding another child to the mix, but my fears are curbed just from knowing that I've been doing this for two years already All the smiles and hugs that you will get make every hardship worth it- and it can be exhausting!! But you will do it- I have quickly learned that moms can do amazing things for their kids that you never imagined.

From my understanding, it is more common for autonomic conditions to be passed down to a daughter, but there are cases where sons have inherited it as well. It really depends on if your POTS is known to be hereditary or not. In my case we believe it was contracted from a Lyme infection and I don't have as much concern about passing on the POTS as I do the Lyme Disease. I wouldn't worry too much about that until there is cause for concern...especially because, if any of our children ever exhibit symptoms we will be the first to recognize them.

Anyway I didn't mean for this to be so long, but I completely understand everything that is going through your head right now...and it's all normal!!! I wish you the very best- when is your little one supposed to arrive?

[MomtoGiuliana]

I know what you are going through too. I am glad you are not so bad off that you can work--that is probably a good sign. At about your stage in pregnancy (I was 34 years, not 21--which I do believe makes a big difference) I had to stop working completely. I was too exhausted. Are you on any medications to help? After pregnancy you can certainly safely start on a number of different meds that should help you recover. I am now very well for the most part--my daughter is 2 and a half. Hopefully you will also be feeling better eventually.

I know you are worried about the future--understandably--but try to take each day as it comes. As far as your child understanding your illness vs hiding it--I think it is hard to hide anything from a child. Further, I believe it is an opportunity for a child to develop more compassion, to have a parent who is not always well. But, these are issues many of us struggle with here on this forum, and we will continue to support each other through it!

Some POTS appears to be genetic. But it is mostly women affected by POTS.

Katherine