Thank Goodness Klutzy Not Crazy

[Joann]

As many people on this site can understand mornings are always rough for me. But some mornings are worse than others. Today was like that for me. I woke up in the middle of the night with sweats, tummy trouble, headache and heart palps. I gave up sleeping about 5:30 and got up. I took my first batch of meds at 6 a.m. and got my husband and daughter out the door for work and school. I was proud of myself, I was soldiering thru the crappiness

I take another bp pill between 7 and 7:30, and I have a usual ritual. I break my pill in half and I get a small glass of water and take them to the living room and place them on this table and wait to take them at a certain time.Now, I am going for tests at CC soon and have been told I may need to wean off my meds. So I decided to try and put off meds by about 1/2 hour. I was listening to the news and was on my kindle and decided finally it was time to take my pill. BUT... it wasn't there! I freaked, looked all around the table, checked my glass.

Did I take without realizing it? I still had water in the glass, and part of my ritual is to drink all the water with the pill. I was freaking out, I missed a dose once and within hours my bp and heart rate were soaring and I was really awful. I checked the bottle, did I not take one out? Nope the right number was in there. I wondered did I drop in route?

By now, if anyone was looking in our front window, which by the way, I had opened the blinds up completely for the best light, and put every possible light on!, they would think there was a crazy woman bouncing around the house. I was on my hands and knees looking at dust bunnies. Swept the kitchen, the living room and the bathroom (why there I don't know). I took every thing off my messy two tiered table, and spent time gong thru my daughers huge bin of school supplies that is on the bottom level. No pill....

My dad called me and said oh, you probably took it. Which of course, annoyed me, because I was thinking, he thinks I am nuts. I told I am 99% sure I did not take it, but because I am not 100% sure I can't get another pill. Now I was pulling out the couch and sweeping the half I could get under. I shook out the blanket I had!!! My house was getting some areas cleaned that I thought I was unable to clean, but panic will do that. LOL.

My dad came over and said let me help. He got down on his hands and knees on the other side of couch near the front door and said if I find it I get a hug, ok? Yea, sure dad. He gets up and says how about one now and then one when I find it, Fine. I give him a hug and then he opens his hand and says is this it?

I couldn't believe it he comes in and in less than a minute finds it!!!! I hugged him again and he showed me where it had gone. It was on the opposite side of the room where I had not been. I probably dropped it on my shirt or blanket and when I stood up it flew!!

I am klutzy but I did not take the pill and not remember it. What a relief! I had spent an hour looking, and then my dad helped me push the table, couch and mircowave tray back into place. Some areas of my house are now cleaner than they have been since I have had this syndrome (18 months) and I feel a little better that I have not lost all of my marbles yet. Now if I can just convince any neighbors that happened to see my morning performance!!!

Oh, and I was able to take my pill an hour late and feel ok. Ain't life grand!!!

[Mydoggielovesme2]

LOL!! At least the rest of your day should be a breeze. Too funny.

[blueskies]

I'm really klutzy and I blame it on brain fog. I'm especially bad at dropping pills. As I'm getting one out of the container I will be thinking to myself 'be careful -- don't want to drop it and have to look for it.' The other day I did just that with a 1mg tablet of Xanax. It was daytime and I spent half an hour looking for it. I knew it hadn't gone far. I went and got my glasses and put them on. I finally got a torch -- and the room was light anyway -- and shined it around spot after spot.

Finally, to my relief I found the pill. It was in plain sight.

I have a 9 month old grandchild who is just crawling and putting everything in her mouth - the smaller the more she likes it. Talk about my high anxiety levels.

I've decided I'm probably going to have to make a habit of taking my meds in my bedroom only and on my bed as my flooring is really light coloured. And I've got to change the quilt on my bed. It's white and I just can't see white tablets on it. And nearly all my meds are white or as good as.

So, new bright coloured quilt to show up any white pills should I drop them AND one spot only to take my pills and where granddaughter is not able to get to (Yet).

The thing is if I hadn't found that pill I would have been convinced it was on the floor somewhere and crawling granddaughter would find it. I feel so responsiblea about this stuff. It's so exhausting.

blue

[Guest Hanice]

Joann

You need to write a novel, I would be ALL-OVER-IT lol! Your writing brought me in and kept me wanting more I swear! You've got some talent girl! Im glad you found that bouncing pill.

And Blue

I'm REALLY glad you found THAT pill OMG! :-D

[Joann]

Hanice, Thanks, I have thought about it, just don't know if I have the discipline. I love stories and books, I am a librarian (just to messed up to work right now).

[blueskies]

I agree with Janice -- you are a good writer. If I had your skill I'd write for sure. I do try and write but the next day I will read what I've written the day before and realize how terrible it is. I'm a big reader so I'm used to good writing. My daughter is a journo and she can write very well. My dad can, also. As could my grandmother. But somehow the ability passed me by. That old saying that there is at least one book in everyone -- well I must be the exception to the rule.

Oh, btw, I do forget that I take a pill every now and then. It's because I'm always full of racing thoughts and not concentrating on one thing at a time. I really really need to learn to live in the moment.

blue

[Joann]

thanks for the encouragement. Well, if I can get my health under some type of control I think I need to try this. I am losing my job because of my health and maybe I can try to use this to make some money and make me feel like I am doing something that is contributing to my family and life. Sigh

But right now, I feel too upset to really write, my health has been so much worse and as many of you experience no doctor really seems to be able to help.

I have been told they feel I will soon be diagnosed with hyper pots, but they also think there is something else going on but again they can't figure it out.

It really stinks. I have been trying to maintain what little health I have, and then yesterday I did something I shouldn't have and it really set me back. I am hoping it is just temporary, but afraid it will make things go on a further back slide. I went up and then down 3 darn steps, I can't figure out if it was the steepness of them or what? But I honestly felt like I was having a heart attack. I do two into my house and it is usually fine but the neighbor has three and stupid me I went up them. Now my one leg is aching so bad and my head is still hurting a day later, Oh and even doing my little steps now feels icky.

I was able to walk my block for hours this weekend at our block party, selling 50/50 tickets and just chatting with everyone. But three steps make me feel like I am dying!!

[Guest Hanice]

Oh, that's totally horrible. I hope you feel better soon. Pm me if you want to talk. You WILL get better tust me. Thats how pots is, a freakin rollercoaster. Be well.