AJVDK Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 Ok I don?t know why today, but I been really kind of down, but have been able to look at the bright side of things but today, I just lost it. All day I been really down and then also sick. Yesterday, I got a procrit shpt and I got sick right after that then the headache came *** it always done ( I had a post about it) today I could get the headache to go away. I took the pain killers they had given me but nothing, my stomach so still upset. I was thinking it was stress, but now I am not so sure. As the headache will not go away I went and got a pain shot just an hour ago. All I did was walk outside and my hearted to beat way to fast due to the heat. I got up to the doctor office and was so out of it. I sat with my eyes shut as the light bother my eyes. Then the called me back, the nurse really didn?t say anything but had the shot in her hands, gave it too me, and while walking out the rest of them just looked at me. You know the looks, some of them truly feel bad, and the others think I am a hassle as I am in a few times a week, from appointments, to shots, and so on. I hate feeling like a pain. My life now is lying around and going to the doctor appointments. I just want more. I know that this maybe my life, it just hard. I called my therapist and left a message so I can get an appointment. I am also stressed out about SSDI, my mom, never see my husband, and dealing with my new life ( staying home and learning to deal with POTS). I just need to vent, and get it off my chest. I already am feeling better. I am going to lie down, as my husband?s mother has my son for the night so I can get some rest. I know things will look better when the physical pain is gone, but will the pain of my old life gone ever get better? Everytime I finally think is better, I think I am ok with my new life, the way I am, something get to be overwhelming and it live I just lose it. I don?t get it. I use to bee so strong, and now I just am not.Sorry for going on. Just really need to let it all out!Amy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nadine Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 It seems in reading several posts, that many are having a hard time emotionally and physically. The heat doesn't help and we long to do things we formerly were able to do when the weather is good. Sorry you are having a bad day- hope tomorrow is better Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest sonotech Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 Amy,All I can say is that I totally understand what you are feeling. I struglle with each and every one of those same issues. When reading your post, I thought...."did I write this??"I wish I knew some "magic trick" to make it all go away, but I don't. All you can do is lean on your family and friends right now and cry as much as you need to.Something will come along a lift your spirits soon, so just hang in there.Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morgan617 Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 We are all in a slump. It seems to hit about twice a year. In the fall and in the spring. Does anyone else notice this pattern?I have so many muscle cramps anymore, I can barely type some days, and I'm terrible at it to begin with. It always seems like you get used to one thing and another pops up to get you again.It does seem to get better, or we just get used to it. We all need a good long cry and pity party, then on go the big girl panties and we try again....morgan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
persephone Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 Big hugs to you, Amy- I've been feeling exactly the same. It is NOT easy to think about th elife you had before and the one you have now. I think once the physical pain subsides you'll get a clearer head on things and start to feel better- I know I do. It's physical pain that gets me every time.I hope you get a bit of remission, like I used to (and I'm sure I will once term ends).Hope you are okP x x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest tearose Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 Yes! Big hugs to you Amy!I think we all need our pilgrimage to the DINET spa!Don't let these feelings take hold of you for long. They will pass. As you noticed by just writing...you got better by just letting it all out!!Sometimes the best thing is when I say "this it a heck of a life" and moan and complain and then validate myself...then I can move past it and feel light and better again!We are all very proud of your sharing and truly feel for the struggle. We know it is hard...don't be hard on yourself! Embrace yourself for the person you are in this moment...fragile, honest, courageous...and getting better all the time! I know the path in and out of the posthole so well I have planted flowers on the path! I have even decorated the potshole. I prefer the outside but respect the darkness...Hope you are having a better day. There are many more good days ahead!best regards, tearose Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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