Having Children...?

[ArmyNPots]

Hello Again All,

I have a beautiful 3 year old boy and my husband and I would like to have another. I understand how pregnancy truly affects our bodies and the **** we go through, even more so with having our condition. I spoke with a Doctor 4 years ago, and i was told to not have any kids. Lo and Behold, Nature took its course a different way and my little boy came along. Another doctor spoke with me and said that having children after 25 when having Dysautonomia, just puts alot more risks into the pregnancy.

I was wondering if anyone had similar problems about wanting to have children or more children but were afraid of the toll it would take on their body and if they could get through it?

God Bless,

Jaime

[bjt22]

I was diagnosed after my last pregnancy. I was told in no uncertain terms that I was not to become pregnant again. For me, this was all right....we were certain our family was complete. I now know that during my last two pregnancies, I had autonomic dysfunction that was progressing. Did the pregnancies cause it to do so more or faster? I'll never know. I know these were really difficult pregnancies, but, part of the reason they seemed so difficult was because no one knew or understood what was happening at that time. That said, I'm not sure my body would have gotten through another pregnancy. I kinda feel like we squeaked through the last one in as far as we had a healthy baby and no major, major catastrophes. Ofcourse, I remember what it was like when we were still deciding to have children, and honestly, that urge was so strong, that I probably would have risked much in order to have a baby that I wanted.

I think there are a few things you can consider, however. You already have one child. What would you do if, while pregnant, you were unable to care for this child because you were too ill to do so? After giving birth, what if you became unable to care for both children? How supportive is your spouse? Would he be able to take time off work to help? Do you have family or close friends near enough to be of help? Do you have the resources to hire help if needed? Do you work outside the home, and if so, what would it do to your family's finances if you couldn't work for a large portion of the time you're pregnant or for a considerable time afterwards? What if your condition deteriorated to the point that you'd never be able to work again? How well do you deal with things being less than perfect? Could you live with maybe your house being messy, or feeling as if your life was chaotic? Could your spouse live with this? What kind of parent do you expect to be? Can you be the parent you want to be even if it means your physical activities could become drastically curtailed? Could you live with being a different kind of parent than you thought or planned on being?

Ofcourse, nothing is for certain for anyone...not only for those of us with chronic illnesses. However, I do think that we need to be even more flexible as parents, and I think our success at parenting totally depends on our being able to be so.

[delphicdragon]

I was actually told that I could have children if I wanted to and there was really no problem in doing so, as I would probably feel better while pregnant. Now, I don't plan to get pregnant for a while yet, and will recheck the research when I do. I'm scared about what being pregnant would do to my body. (And am pretty sure I would be just as scared if there WASN'T anything wrong with me). I also have to think about passing on my Ehlers-Danlos to any children I might have, and that is more of a concern to me than how my body will react while pregnant.

Just my $.02.

Sara

[sheba]

I was told that being pregnant with POTS could be a good thing because your blood volume will increase. That is a good thing the only thing is the added stress on the body would concern me.

[lalalisa]

Hello,

I realize that having children is a huge decision - especially when you have an illness like POTS but did want to chime in and let you know that I've been given nothing but encouragement from Dr. Grubb as far as having children. He's been extremely positive whenever I've talked about it and just wanted me to know that he'd help walk me through the pregnancy as much as possible. This said I do still have concerns that I could take a turn for the worse after the delivery, but you just never know.

Oh, I also saw a high risk OB recently because I also have congenital heart disease and the dr. wasn't phased by my POTS as far as pregnancy - she was just like we'll just take what comes but everything should be fine.

Hope this helps,

Lisa

[MomtoGiuliana]

I think POTS takes a different course with each person as far as severity that this question is specific for each of us. Many patients on this site have had uneventful full-term pregnancies with POTS. I like the questions bjt22 asks. These have to be carefully considered. I think you need to make this decision in cosultation with an ob/gyn with experience with POTS (I think an EP might tend to be more conservative than necessary) and with your spouse/partner and family who may have to give you support.

[Jeannie32]

Adding my thoughts on the subject... I have not personally discussed having a child with my doctors as of yet - and - unless I experience a SUSTAINED period of improvement -- I simply CAN NOT justify getting pregnant! This is with or without the blessings of my doctors...

At 32, I realize that my biological clock is ticking. But I am fatigued all the time - I have frequent migranes and body aches - I am taking multiple medications daily - and experience constant and ever-changing symptoms which are related to the POTS (and some that are not). To sum it up - most days I feel more than pitiful!

Who will nurture and care for the child when I am unable - sometimes for days at a time? How is this fair to my husband - or me - or MOST IMPORTANTLY the child itself?

My wonderful husband supports this as well.

[hollie]

I think this is something only you and your dr. can deside. I think every woman and every situation is different.

As for me... I have two children and I had not been dx until they were 3 & 5 years old. I always wondered why I had such rough pregnancies. I had symptoms for years and I did feel them much worse when I was pregnant. I was on bedrest for the last 3 months of both pregnancies because of fatigue and contractions. (contractions started at 19 weeks and 17 weeks) Now... whether the contractions had anything to do with POTS... I'll never know. But I do know the fatigue, light headedness, etc. was POTS. I do know I always wanted 4 kids, but we are now done at 2. I've desided that the two I have are enough to keep me running more than I can handle already. I know I would not be able to physically handle a baby. For me, bending real low or squating makes my symptoms worse. So having another little one would be rough! (Probably more so after the baby came than when I would be pregnant.) Maybe had I known that I had POTS back then, I may have been able to control the symptoms more.

I think the questions asked before are very important. I think it all depends on what you're willing to go through and what your support arround you is willing to help with when needed - whether it's before the baby comes or after they are here. Good luck desiding!

Hollie