Please Help, Need Support...venting...help

[navyblue]

I'm so so so tired of this. And I'm not even sure if I can attribute my issues to the POTS anymore. I'm enraged that a chiropractic neck manipulation has set off such anxiety and head pressure and horrible feelings. I've read several accounts online of people whom post neck manipulation - felt woozy, head pressurized, how I do....- and it went on for years with no end in sight.

Then there's the people for whom it only worsened things for awhile. And the vast majority of the population for whom it had no ill effects or even helped headaches, dizziness, etc.

I'm so mad because I was doing pretty well before she did it.

Now I'm in the throes of terrible head pressure (and intermittent numb left leg) and I don't know when this will end.

I feel like I can't do my schoolwork. I'm not eating much. I don't want to listen to music or do anything enjoyable. I know I should just take my mind off it. I even felt pretty okay last night. But those accounts...they haunt me.

Mostly I'm just so extremely sick of freaking out about my health and getting depressed from it and making myself worse and the unknown. Last winter I hit rock bottom when I couldn't figure out why I was dizzy. Eventually it started to get better and I started to calm down and live my life. I started to realize that the "me" was not gone, the me who could laugh or get an A on a final or enjoy a meal out or a road trip. I went through so many different things I thought it could be.

Once I knew it was POTS (even though I don't know the cause), I was sad about it for a little bit but then mostly happy that I finally had my answer and that it was known to wax and wane, could get better, and wasn't known as progressive. I did a lot of research and felt more in control.

I went through a lot of worry about Chronic Fatigue Syndrome about 2 months ago with increased tiredness but it didn't really get worse, if anything it got more manageable.

But this feels different. I'm feeling utterly lost and I can't shake the fact that the chiro messed me up...and I wouldn't care so much if there weren't so many accounts of it being permanent

I'm sorry for how gloomy I sound but I just need to feel like I can go on

I always feel like such a wimp when I see the posts of people who've suffered much worse and longer but I just...I put a lot of pressure on myself to do well in school, to be fun to be around, to be liked, to enjoy life....and this just makes it really really hard. I feel like I'm a weak person.

This vent I guess was more for me, but I really would appreciate any advice/support.

[MomtoGiuliana]

So sorry you are having a rough time with head pressure, etc. The symptoms we experience can be varied and certainly overwhelming at times. It can be really really hard as you say! Do you have a dysautonomia specialist evaluating and treating you?

Yes I would try to keep in mind that, if this is what you have been diagnosed with, for most people the symptoms wax and wane and for many get better over time. but there are also many treatments available to try, under the care of a doctor, preferably a specialist.

[vet_runner]

Hi Navy Blue,

Big hugs! I've felt the same way. Last winter was rock bottom for me too - I felt so sick, spent a lot of days on the couch, fell behind in school and had no idea what was wrong and how to get better. The diagnosis does help, but I think it's completely normal to go through times when you are angry and sad and everything in between. Or at least it's normal for me! I go through that when I relapse, especially when I had been doing really well and it just knocks me down. The last week has been like that for me. Last night, I made myself go to the gym because I know it's good for me, and I looked around at all the athletes and thought about the 'old me' that was an athlete and wanted to cry.

I have found going to see a counsellor helpful. It's not only good to vent, but have someone acknowledge that it's okay to feel this way, and brainstorm some coping mechanisms to get you through the tough time. It's also really important to show yourself some empathy and compassion. It's easier to do that for others than ourselves.

Hang in there. Positive thoughts your way.