How To Survive Dinner Parties

[Mare]

Hello, This POTS thing can be so exhausting and annoying. I continue to try to be social, but it isn't easy. I have terrible heat intolerance, norephinephrine surges and low aldosterone at times. I take fludro which helps with the hydration at least. After experiencing being overheated and sweaty, tiredness, tachycardia and not being able to eat much of the food a host may serve, I am becoming quite anxious at the thought of having to attend sit down, more formal dinners. I have 2 dinners coming up, one I cannot get out of. The first is with my husbands colleagues ( which I bet many people dread in general ) The host is from India, and is excited to be serving us all Indian cuisine. I live in Silicon Valley, and I do like some Indian foods but some of it is very spicy. I have no idea how this will affect my heat intolerance, But just the thought of sitting at a table, joining in the discussion with people I have not met is already making me anxious. I used to enjoy this sort of thing, but I never know what my body may throw at me to deal with these days, whether its being flushed and sweaty, super tachycardia which then leads quickly to exhaustion, or will it be fuzzy brain? Maybe I will glide right thru it all, with just a touch of easily adjustable symptoms. I have a prescription for Propanalol,

The heat has really been a factor for me. For instance, I seem to need air circulating even in slightly warm conditions, as I found myself in while visiting a friend who had a newborn. The room was slightly on the warm side, but the air was very still which caused overheating and sweating. This is uncomfortable and makes it hard to focus outwardly at whom I am visiting. I recognize that I must try to forget about focusing on me, but its so hard.

The formal dinner party I must go to is that of future in laws. I adore them. However, they are from Rome, and host 5 course meals that are ridiculously filling, and long in duration. One course is always a bowl of pasta, and that's a meal unto its self.

Any suggestions on how to get over my anxiety and survive these things? It is sad that often I feel like i am surviving an activity, which could be making it thru the grocery store, party, airplane trip, etc. I have made a lot of progress in managing my symptoms, and I continue to push myself towards being able to do more and more when I can. But after several uncomfortable episodes at parties, including my own, I am just dreading them.

[Bigskyfam]

I don't attend dinner parties... But when out in a crowd or at work... I sip water, use something to cool myself, frequent trips to bathroom and normally iv fluids prior to. Countermanouvers like crossing legs while standing and moving my fingers and toes. I layer my clothes to help temp control.im not on meds. I agree... Before all these pots symptoms started I led a very social life. All I can think of at the moment. Hope you are able to go. Keep us posted.

[statesof]

I understand the feeling of "getting through" an activity rather than enjoying it, anxiety alone can make things intolerable. I would just make sure you are doing all the things you need to control your autonomic symptoms. I typically bring an extra verapamil if my hr/ chest pressure comes up a bit, I make sure I don't have to do a lot of walking so as to not set off my symptoms, I make sure to drink plenty of water during the meal even if I'm not particularly thirsty, and I usually bring a Xanax just in case but typically don't have to take it.

I think having POTS just forces us to have to do some pre-planning for any family or group events, for me it's less about having to make sure the night goes perfectly, and more about setting myself up so that things can go well enough so that my autonomic symptoms don't control the night for me. Sometimes even taking a second car just in case I need to go home early and lie down makes me feel more comfortable.

[Mare]

Thank You @bigskyfam and @statesof! I really appreciate you advice and support. I do take my own car, so I can leave early and on my own terms, and I always have fluids and salt with me, That IV before activities sounds great, and one doc recommended I get IV's weekly, but my current doc disagrees.

I feel like I am becoming a bit burned out on putting in so much effort to do simple and not so simple things, and its a lot of work, with not always great results. I am sure that many of you know this. I try to put up a good front, so friends and even family sometimes don't know that often that trip to the grocery store, or going to the Post Office, or other simple activities are a challenge. I never tell them that when I am at someones home, and I go to use the restroom, it may be to lay on the floor for a few minutes and breath. It ***** sometimes. I skipped the formal dinner last weekend. I was truly exhausted from just getting back from flying to Boise to visit a good friend with 3 small children. That in itself was a challenge, and although it wasn't perfect, we still had a great time. My husband attended the party and reported back that even if i was feeling good, it would have been difficult. The house was too warm (ugh) , and the dinner was too long. I am so relieved to have had a really good reason to not attend.

Today, I went to the birthday party, and I did really well. Not only did I survive, I had a good time being with family and friends. Heat intolerance was not an issue, and my symptoms eased off for today. ( I think that I am in some sort of waning phase) I needed this success to keep going and not giving up on being somewhat social. I am still figuring out this POTs thing, and I am thankful for this forum, to check how others deal with symptoms and adjustments.

Thank You