Feeling Alone Outside Of This Forum

[bttrflyamby1981]

Hi All,

I have been pushing myself again! But it's mosly because others don't understand my limits. I try to please others but in doing this I push myself too far. I am having a dizzy day..almost fell over. My vission is blury and my body is weak. It's my fault I know...but can't help being frustrated.

I look normal and can fake being fine...I don't want people to feel sorry for me, so I continue to push myself.

The only people who I know understand is on this forum. I feel lost at home and with people I work with (it's a job, but I'm my own boss, so can take off anytime). They just don't get it. I have told the girls I work with that I have "issues" but feel they make me feel that I'm making excuses. If only they knew!!

Anyway, just needed to get that off my chest...

thank you all,

Amber

[dawn]

Amber,

I know how you feel. I am organizing a 4 day trip this weekend with friends and family. I came up with the idea on a day I was feeling good and now I can't back out and feel like crap. They call and I avoid answering the phone until I can psyche myself up to call them and sound excited. I guess we all push on, in reality much of the world has to.

I try to look at those less fortunate than myself and believe me somedays it is hard to come up with blessings that I am thankful for.

As far as work, don't feel guilty. You don't have to give an explanation. I used think, well it's better that they talk about me, at least they are leaving someone else alone. Guilt is just wasted energy.

People pleaser also-

Dawn

[Tammy]

Hi Amber,

It's so wonderful having this forum - all of us who for the most part don't look too sick, even though we feel like death most days-- I sometimes wonder if it'd be easier if we looked as sick as we feel!!! I guess for the most part, people aren't very understanding in a lot of ways, and all too often, if they haven't experienced what a person has been through it's difficult for them to be compassionate about it. I was recently watching a talk show and this lady was on that had been extremely obese and she was talking about how people would laugh at her and make comments that she could hear about her body. She said how those people are just mean and they don't realize how she has feelings and a heart too. I guess everyone deals with judgemental attitudes in someway or another It's sure not easy, but in someway, maybe if one good things come out of all this, it's that we are very empathetic to those who are suffering in so many ways.

((Hugs))

Tammy

[futurehope]

It took a while for me, but I'm at the point where I do tell people that I do not feel as good as I look, or that I wish I were feeling as good as I look.

I not longer "fake" feeling all right unless I'm really wanting to stay whereever I am and not go home.

It takes too much energy to fake it. I did that for a year on my job and I felt like I was in h***.

I can totally relate to what you're saying. I look absolutely fine and feel terrible. Who can understand that but us POTsies?