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How do you convince people to give you a go?

I had a interview for exchange today, I was told that the exchange office was not concerned about my health as long as i had a letter from a dr to say i was ok (which i did). I was expecting the questions to be based on my studies and what i want to achieve from studying elsewhere. Yet new people interviewed me and most of the questions were relating to my health and it kind of threw me. I understand why they were concerned yet i really dont know how to put thier mind at ease, my honest answer would be i am not sure if i would be able to cope yet i need to at least try. Also i wonder how does anyone really KNOW that they will be able to cope, im sure some healthy people freak out in a foreign environment, yet of course we would not apply unless we believed we could handle it.

They also kept asking about leadership positions i have taken up ... i just told them the truth that most of my energy had been put into dealing with my health. I was never able to run for school captin as i had to leave school ... i could have lied i suppose.

Interviews feel so false ...Its like you have to regurgitate what you think they want to hear, i much prefer the truth. I would also prefer they focus on what my proffessors have to say about me and my ability to cope.

I was just wondering about your expeirences and how you overcame this question. I fear there may be a few hurdles to get over so i need to do some solid convinceing and need all the tips i can get :)

The truth is i am feeling alot better and now i just want to attempt to do things that i was perviously unable to do ... and i dont know if i will ever be at a stage that im CERTIN i will be able to cope ... but i want to at least know that i attempted them (even if i fail). How can i explain that to people who have not experienced it personally and who are trying to look out for my welfare (or to make sure im a good representitive of my uni). I also dont want to cry, when i really think about what i want and how much i want it i cry .... its annoying and embarassing.

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Since i am with the equity unit the uni is aware of my health situation so it was on my record ... its not that they asked me, im not sure if that changes matters.

It seems they have to look out for my "welfare" .. they were talking about it and the man who seemed really worried wanted to make sure that as long as i have a letter from a dr the liability is with the dr (trying to cover themselves i suppose .. what for i am unsure) ... i think they are covering thier arse. They kept saying how stressful situations can impact on your health ... i realise they were trying to be nice but i was like I KNOW ... i think we all know how evil stress is hehe.

My mum said that its discrimination for them to act like that and as a student i should have the opportunity to apply for all avenues open to healthy students ... im not sure if thats true or not.

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Morgan, it's illegal in the US for them to ask specific health questions, but not necessarily illegal elsewhere. Also, in the US they *may* ask you if you have any health problems that would interfere with your ability to do the job that you're interviewing for--so to some extent, they can ask you about your health, but no further than it's relation to whatever you're interviewing for.



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ok thanks nina, it wouldnt be discrimination then :angry:

Not that id ever take it to court, i would just hope my health continues going well and try again next year. In the meantime i just have to work out how to express my belief that i will be able to cope (and not get emotional and start crying heh)

Does anyone else find they get really emotional talking about this sort of stuff? Well your health problems and how it will impact on your dreams/goals...

Have you got any tips on avoiding the tears or shakes? I suppose i am asking a impossible question. *sigh*


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Ernie thats really good advice, thanks! i will work on that, I usually do that by pretending to myself that i dont want things as much as a i do or being fatalistic in my expectations. Originally i was, i didnt expect them to say its all fine... then i got the green flag for 4 months so i got my hopes up. I will just have to go back to square one and start that pretending again i suppose....

Sorry to be all whingy guys, i think i just needed to vent. I just was really hopeing i could attempt something that i have wanted to do since i was 5. You all know how sometimes dreams seem to fade when you fall ill and i just got them back again. I was quite upset on friday but im a bit calmer now (maybe the denial or detachment is kicking in already hehe)... thanks for the responses :angry:

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I'm one of those odd folks that likes interviews. I know who I am, and what I want. So an interview is fun for me, because I sit and talk about myself. Not to sound vain, but you know yourself better than anybody else. Some interviewers can be really tough, but just stay calm and don't let them rattle your cage. It's a time for you to sell yourself, and let them get to know you and for you to get to know the interviewer/company etc. You can ask questions too!

Ernie said to detach yourself...I think that is how she said it. I agree, you will have situations in life where you just need to stay calm, breath through it, and detach yourself. You can get hysterical later on in the privacy of your home, and rant, but don't let them see it.

Nina is correct about it being illegal to ask much on heath stuff. I just mention that I sometimes pass out, need extra fluids, a cool space and a chair for when I need which is most of the time. Everybody I tell is cool with it, and just wants to know what to do if I pass out so they don't panic or do the wrong thing. If people are horrible to you, you know right away, "Hey, this isn't the place for me." It varies on the situation but I like to let people know I pass out and need to sit etc. Otherwise people think I am lazy and spoiled and I'm not. I just need those things so I can function. There is no shame in being sick, it can be really tough at times but its okay not to be like everybody else. Part of life is learning how to deal with these things along with rejection and acceptence. If I get rejected for something, it bothers me, but I know there is a good reason and I typically find out I am really glad I didn't get the job down the road. Things have a way of working out...it just doesn't always seem like it at the time. Take care and good luck! The more you have to do these things, the easier it gets!

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Thanks for the supportive words blackbirdsings :angry:

Only thing is it isnt a job, its to get placement in a exchange program. Its much easier in undergrad than post grad (more options too). Its open to every student that does not have a fail on thier record and who holds a average over 65. I fit into those catogories. It does say in the fine print that if you have health troubles they would need a letter of support from your dr, I have the letter.

I was expecting a question or two .. just not nearly every question relating to it. I may be reading too much into it, and i understand thier concern. It just threw me as it was brought up with every question.

Its good to hear that you have had good experiences in interviews and they have been supportive of your needs. One day i will be in the work force and i am terrified of handelling those sorts of questions! There is that whole teaching that you dont let people know your weakness in interviews or you turn them into positives, i will have to work on that with practice. The fact that you have had support makes me feel better :) thanks.

So i will work on detachment and calmness ....

When you get interviewed for jobs do they ask about your extracurricular stuff? sorry if that sounds silly .... i just know that in some businesses they have soccor teams or clubs that do certain things outside of work.

If your future employers are interested in those kinds of things how do you get around those questions? I am by no means anti social and i support events as i can but i am not part of clubs as i put most of my energy into my actual studies. However i do help at conferences in holidays sometimes .. i told them that then realised how petty it sounded when others are running theatre productions. But for me it was a big and exciting achievement hee.

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