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I Overdid It Today : (


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I'm missing my sons Christmas concert he is going to be an elf.

He has a part with lines and he will sing and dance.

I had a much overdue appt with outpatient today with a dietician.

It went very well.

She talked to me for over 2 hours.

Can you believe it was her.

This summer I spoke to her on the phone I was down to 86 pounds and questioning whether I should be hospitalized.

The delimma is I am allergic to corn.

Are you familiar with TPN?

Nutrtion they put right into your veins?

Well it's made of corn so I'm not a candidate.

With my allergies I'm facing anaphylaxis vs starvation.

This is my battle everyday.

It's a hard battle.

I am very tired.

My body is weak too tired to get up and answer the phone.

I took it as I sign I shouldn't go tonight.

Maybe I could have had the appt a different day than the concert but it was the first I could get in and so well worth it.

I couldn't believe it was the same dietician.

So her verdict is that she commended me for all my hard work.

She is communicating with my physician and speaking to my anorexia and anxiety issues.

She says I am not anorexic based on talking to me.

Anorexic from a stand point of being underweight that is all- no psychological issues and she said the only anxiety I seem to have is based on real fear.

She said not to keep trying to eat any of the foods that my throat constricts with that it's a bad sign.

She wants me to see a metabolic specialist and a geneticist.

With talking to me she thinks there maybe a metabolic problem.

So finally someone who wants to help me praise God!

I go back in six weeks.

I'm so sorry I cannot make it tonight.

I love my kids so much and it kills me to not be there.

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I'm happy for you and about the appointment that went so well, that is great news. I'm sorry though you have to miss your son's concert. He more than likely knows that mommy has been feeling not well and he should understand and I know how you feel. It's sometimes a toss up, of course we love our kids and we put them first but at the same time, we have to take care of our own bodies and listen to them, try and heal ourselves so that we can do these things with the kids. It breaks my heart that I can't do all the things I want to with them and have to have others' help, etc.

He knows you're a good mommy!!! Good luck with the new nutrition stuff, keep us posted.

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I'm sorry you were feeling too weak and tired to go to your son's concert, but you did the right thing by not pushing yourself too much. I'm often too fatigued and weak to go anywhere too, and I know how hard it can be to miss out on important events. I'm sure your son understands. Maybe someone recorded the concert so you may still be able to watch it later. Could you ask? I hope the dietician and the specialists will be able to help you. I hope you feel better!

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