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I Got Scared A While Ago?


Guest humanb4monitor

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Guest humanb4monitor

Sorta panic but sad. Scared sad, owies in heart.

I KNOW I have made me and the universe and you guys help me have 2 decent daze in a row. Been a while. But then...late..when alone and tired....all the many many many many countless harms become an awarenss in my soul and I sink. It is ok. I will try again tomorrow.

I have decided NOT to slam slam slam myself because my daze as of late cannot begin till 3 or later. That has to be OK.

To not be worthless because I am not running all over by 10a.m.

I worked out last 2 daze as did some repotting here while working out. Kept the AC on and did errands later.....

If I have to lie down 2 hours after retting up--so be it for now.

I want to feel better before going to a gigantic music fest July 8---11th. I will not have to camp because I live down the mt but there could be 30,000 people there. But it is not like in MY day :P:):blink::blink:

But I need my tribe ad music and dancing and people and merchandise. I have newtworked with a great young girl from the net who is going. She is a jr. at AZ State in huge environ. engineering!

Just my kind of person!

So...."!no bad dreams tonight!!! HEAR ME demons!" And tomorrow will come. I need this summer to get me out of this state and to a HOME. 15 years is enough.

Oh--I have an appt. with the HEAD of The sleep clinic at the Cleveland Clinic on July 14th. Gonna stay a few days and hang on the lake 9Erie) at the lighthouse ;)

EARTH/SKY/LOVE.

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More power to you! I love that you're trying to not focus as much on the negatives and are even getting in some exercise. Kudos to you! It can be so hard...I know some days I'm sure I won't make it to the gym or on our treadmill at home, but once I make myself get my shoes on and get started, I usually do okay. Better than nothing.

I'm so happy your last two days have gone well, and I wish you many more.

Take good care,

Jana

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