all4family Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Hi Everyone,Well I have still been trying to hold on to the thought that this was just a small set back for me, and I was still getting better. Yesterday I started in with not being able to eat again, even when lying down. Now I am vomitting again. I can't stand without feeling like I am on a boat. And unfortunatly I feel like that when I am laying too. My neighbor noticed I was loosing weight, and "complimented" me which I need to lose it, and if I were even trying to it would have been a compliment, but it was just a reminder that I have no control of anything with my own body. This is how it began for me with my other 2 really bad crashes that left me completly useless. I am really scared, and depressed about this. I am afraid of going back to doctors who don't believe me, and only can offer me things that in the end make me feel sicker. I feel like there is no help for me. I really don't want to live the rest of my life like this. I am sorry for feeling sorry for myself. I am trying so hard to just be OK with this, but I am not. I am tense everywhere and really don't know if I should blame the disease or just being so dang scared of going through this again. I don't know where to turn, except to you guys that understand. Even typing this is leaving me so confused. I really am sorry I feel like such a complainer. That is not my personality. I really wish I could just have some hope right now. Thank you all for listening, and allowing me this outlet. Suzy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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